Книга - The Way We Wed

The Way We Wed
Pat Warren


THE AGENT: Jeff Kirby, M.D. in the makingTHE MISSION: Making sure his beautiful bride lives to see their wedding vows through!THE HEARTBREAKING TRUTH: Married in haste, Jeff and Tish were more strangers than man and wife… .They had married in secret, two undercover agents with nothing to lose– except maybe the love of a lifetime. For though Jeff Kirby tried to keep Tish Buckner by his side, tragedy tore the newlyweds apart. Now Tish' s life hung in the balance, and Jeff was hoping against hope that he and Tish would get a second chance at the life they once dreamed of. Because this time, the determined M.D. wouldn' t let his woman get away!







As an evil traitor threatens

to destroy the top-secret SPEAR agency,

A YEAR OF LOVING DANGEROUSLY continues….



Jeff Kirby

A green-eyed M.D. and a man

very much in love with his wife…



Though he’d married Tish Buckner in haste, this M.D. in training took his vows very seriously. Especially now that his bride was struggling for her life!



Tish Buckner

A stubborn strength in her dark brown eyes

was outdone only by her passion



She never dreamed she and Jeff had a chance, yet her heart could not refuse his sudden proposal. But had her dangerous undercover work jeopardized her future with Jeff?



Del Rogers

An amber-eyed agent

who is determined to get his man



After seeing the havoc the deadly traitor called Simon had caused for his colleagues, Del is prepared to do anything to take down the man who hopes to take down SPEAR….


Dear Reader,



Once again, we’ve rounded up six exciting romances to keep you reading all month, starting with the latest installment in Marilyn Pappano’s HEARTBREAK CANYON miniseries. The Sheriff’s Surrender is a reunion romance with lots of suspense, lots of passion—lots of emotion—to keep you turning the pages. Don’t miss it.



And for all of you who’ve gotten hooked on A YEAR OF LOVING DANGEROUSLY, we’ve got The Way We Wed. Pat Warren does a great job telling this tale of a secret marriage between two SPEAR agents who couldn’t be more different—or more right for each other. Merline Lovelace is back with Twice in a Lifetime, the latest saga in MEN OF THE BAR H. How she keeps coming up with such fabulous books, I’ll never know—but I do know we’re all glad she does. Return to the WIDE OPEN SPACES of Alberta, Canada, with Judith Duncan in If Wishes Were Horses…. This is the kind of book that will have you tied up in emotional knots, so keep the tissues handy. Cheryl Biggs returns with Hart’s Last Stand, a suspenseful romance that will keep you turning the pages at a furious clip. Finally, don’t miss the debut of a fine new voice, Wendy Rosnau. A Younger Woman is one of those irresistible stories, and it’s bound to establish her as a reader favorite right out of the starting gate.



Enjoy them all, then come back next month for more of the best and most exciting romance reading around—only in Silhouette Intimate Moments.



Yours,






Leslie J. Wainger

Executive Senior Editor




The Way We Wed

Pat Warren







www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)


This book is dedicated to my neighbor,

Judy Eddy, whose energy and sense of humor

make her a joy to be around.








A note from popular writer Pat Warren, author of over thirty novels for Silhouette and Harlequin Books



Dear Reader,



As much as I love writing and reading romances, I’m also very drawn to mysteries, which is why when the editors at Silhouette offered me a chance to be a part of A YEAR OF LOVING DANGEROUSLY, I jumped at it. To watch a love story unfold between two special people is heartwarming. Then to see all the dangers their jobs—their very lives—are involved in is pure excitement.



Tish Buckner turned her back on a life of privilege to work with the agents of SPEAR because she believes in what they stand for. She’s intelligent, highly trained and dedicated, as well as very beautiful. She has no intention of falling in love, yet from the moment she lays eyes on Jeff Kirby, she’s his.



Jeff’s had a hard life—abandoned by his alcoholic parents, living on the streets, constantly on the run. Until East Kirby, a highly respected SPEAR agent, found him and showed him how to care. When he meets Tish, he’s ready for love. Now all he has to do is convince her that what they feel is real and lasting.



And all they both have to do is stay alive amid terrorist bombings and an evil man out to destroy SPEAR.



I’ve been a part of several continuities, starting with Harlequin’s TYLER series a while back, then Silhouette’s first MONTANA MAVERICKS and also the more recent MONTANA MAVERICKS series. It’s a privilege and a challenge to join so many talented authors in telling a thrilling love story with a mystery threaded throughout all twelve books. I hope you enjoy reading about Tish and Jeff’s romance as much as I enjoyed writing it for you.











Contents


Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Epilogue




Chapter 1


Condor Mountain Resort and Spa

The late afternoon sun was quite hot along the Pacific Coast of Southern California even in mid-April. Jeff Kirby felt his shirt sticking to his back as well as the dampness of his jogging shorts, but he ignored both. Running on the hard-packed sand of the beach at the foot of Condor Mountain Resort and Spa was something he looked forward to each time he returned. His shoes hit the ground with staccato precision, spraying clumps of wet sand as he made his way north alongside the frothy waves. Some distance out, seagulls artfully dived into the sea in search of a late lunch.

Glancing at a cloudless blue sky, Jeff felt glad to be alive, grateful for each day. A near-death experience will do that to a person, he decided. He’d come a shade too close for comfort last year and didn’t ever want to repeat the ordeal. Yet he was increasingly aware that the work he did, the job he’d chosen, would ultimately put him in danger more often than not. He knew that, yet chose to stay, and his reasons were many and varied. They included his dad, the exciting challenge and the assurance that he was contributing, doing some good in some small way.

Jeff’s adoptive father, Easton Kirby, had once been one of the top field agents for SPEAR, a secret government agency that dated back to the Civil War and was rumored to have been founded by no less than Abraham Lincoln himself. But a devastating personal incident had all but turned East into a recluse, a man haunted by his own demons, one who holed up in his room at Condor and withdrew from all who cared about him.

Until the night he’d encountered a fourteen-year-old boy who’d run away from the latest in a series of foster homes, a boy as damaged and needy as East was. That boy’s name was Jeff.

They’d both been the walking wounded back then, but each had managed to overcome a disturbing past, to bond with one another and learn to care, to trust again. After a slow healing time, East, who’d been twenty-five ten years ago, only eleven years older than Jeff, had adopted the boy and taken over the running of Condor Mountain Resort as a civilian employee. Only occasionally these days did either of them speak of those past terrible years.

Through most of his teen years and later, Jeff had met or heard about several agents—men and women—who’d been badly hurt in the line of duty, some physically, some emotionally. A few had even died. But with the arrogance of youth, he’d felt certain none of those things would happen to him. He’d quickly shot up to a height of six feet, lean and muscled from training sessions and working out regularly. He’d felt confident, invincible, ready to take on the world.

Until the day he’d been kidnapped, buried alive and left to die.

Slowing his steps, Jeff came to a stop, breathing deeply. He bent over, bracing his hands on his knees, letting his body cool. That episode had changed him forever.

Finally he straightened, squinting into the sun, swiping the dampness from his face. It was after he’d been rescued that he’d learned from Alicia, the woman Easton eventually married, how the kidnapping had affected his adoptive father. East had left the comfort and safety of Condor Resort and spearheaded the operation that had saved Jeff’s life. That was the second time Easton had rescued Jeff. His gratitude and love for the man knew no bounds.

A curious gull executed a graceful landing close to where Jeff stood, cocking his head at the human intruder before taking off overhead. Jeff watched the bird circling for a minute, envying his freedom of movement, then started on his run back to the only real home he’d ever known. He ran more slowly this time, appreciating the pull and strain of his muscles. He’d recently returned from Australia where he’d received more field training for his medevac specialty before the summer session began. He’d doubled up on his courses and attended med school year-round, and he’d just finished his first year of residency with two more to go before becoming a full-time doctor and SPEAR agent.

Jeff frowned as his thoughts drifted to another matter, one equally if not more important to him: Tish Buckner. Skirting a moss-covered rock, he wondered why the course of love never ran smoothly. Certainly East and Alicia—or Ally as she liked to be called—had had some difficult times and it was no different with almost everyone he knew. Falling in love was only the beginning, Jeff decided. It was the happily-ever-after part that was a problem.

He’d met Tish last year at Red Rock Ranch in northern Arizona where he’d gone to recuperate after his ordeal, and he’d fallen for her fast and hard. She was a SPEAR agent who’d come to take a refresher course on her vacation because she wasn’t the type for lazing about. But their road to happiness had been filled with stumbling blocks right from the start and, sadly, they’d gone their separate ways. Running across her in Australia a few weeks ago had been a lucky break, but they’d had too little private time. He’d pretty well convinced her they should try again when the call had come in that Tish was needed along with several other SPEAR agents. A traitor known as Simon, who’d been orchestrating all sorts of treasonous acts against the country and framing Jonah, the head of SPEAR, had been traced to New York. Tish had quickly boarded a helicopter to follow him. But she’d promised to meet with Jeff to talk more as soon as her assignment ended.

This time he’d make her see that they belonged together, Jeff vowed, as his steps brought him back to the foot of the majestic resort where he paused. As always, this view from below captured his imagination. The first time East had walked with him along the beach and they’d paused at the steps leading up, forty-four to be exact, Jeff had said the place looked like pictures of castles he’d seen in books. He never had figured out how they’d managed to put up such a magnificent building that was five stories from the beach side, yet appeared to be only four from the front entrance. As boy and man, the arrangement had intrigued him.

It was part of the Monarch Hotel chain owned and operated as one of SPEAR’s legitimate business enterprises. The lobby floor of Condor offered moneyed guests a luxurious retreat with a magnificent view and a cosmopolitan atmosphere with a renowned chef holding court in both restaurants. Floors two, three and four offered suites of varying sizes, all beautifully appointed. But the penthouse floor was where East and Alicia had their quarters plus there were private rooms reserved for agents who might need a little R and R, some downtime. East saw to it that they got what they needed and went back to the field refreshed. Jeff’s room was also located on the fourth floor.

At the sound of a barking sea lion, Jeff turned to watch the slick seal sun himself on a spit of land that zigzagged into the sea. Some Californians didn’t care for this rocky, often treacherous section of beach, but Jeff loved it. There was majesty here and power and, ultimately, peace. He stood for a minute more gazing at the relentless waves pounding at the shore, then began the steep climb.

He was nearly to the landing that led to the stone stairs of the terrace dining room where waiters were setting the tables for the evening meal when he spotted his dad standing by the waist-high railing. As always, Jeff was aware that there was a certain presence about East that people recognized immediately. Perhaps it was his height, a couple of inches taller than Jeff’s six feet, or his powerful build that suggested he might be a professional athlete. There was a hint of mystery about East that attracted women and intrigued men. He was definitely a formidable man, but Jeff had experienced the kindness and compassion beneath the tough exterior of those chiseled features.

Now, as Jeff hurried up the last few steps, he couldn’t help wondering what had put that very serious look on his father’s face. From the beginning, they’d shared a remarkable intuition about one another that was usually right.

Jeff felt a worried frown form as he stepped onto the terrace. “What’s wrong?” he asked East.

“Let’s go to my quarters and I’ll tell you.” East made his way through the tables, nodding to the maître’d who was arranging dinner menus.

Jeff followed him across the rustic lobby past the guest elevators and stopped in front of the one at the far end, their private car to the fourth floor. As East inserted his special key to gain access, Jeff felt a shiver skitter down his spine which had nothing to do with the air-conditioning cooling his sweaty body. Dad had taught him patience as a teenager—which went against his nature—and also that they were never to discuss SPEAR business in front of outsiders. Stepping into the elevator and turning to face the doors that silently slid shut, his thoughts ran through several possibilities, but he couldn’t seem to settle on any one thing. The most probable choice was that SPEAR needed him at some other location where his medevac training, incomplete though it was, would be useful.

Stepping out on the penthouse floor, East again used his key to enter his quarters and walked directly to the kitchen where he handed Jeff a clean towel before pouring him a tall glass of orange juice.

Jeff knew his dad was not one to be rushed, that he would say what needed to be said in his own way. So he drank the juice and wiped his face, then draped the towel around his neck as his anxiety built. East was openly studying him, as if gauging how best to deliver bad news. Finally Jeff could stand it no longer. “What is it?”

“There’s been an accident. In New York.” The ever present shadows in East’s brown eyes seemed to darken to near black. “Several agents were checking out a warehouse where Simon was reportedly stockpiling weapons. A bomb went off.”

Jeff felt the blood drain from his face as his hands tightened on the glass he was holding. “Tish?” He managed to get her name out, his voice strained. Oh, God! Not now, please.

“She’s in the hospital, unconscious.” East reached over, placed a hand on his son’s shoulder and squeezed hard.

“The prognosis?” Jeff asked as a terrible weight took up residence in his chest.

East shook his head. “No one knows.”

Jeff was not a man who could wait for answers. He had to take action, to find out for himself. He set down the glass and picked up the phone on the kitchen counter. “What hospital?”

East handed him a notepad where he’d jotted down the phone number, knowing his son would want to call. “Metropolitan General in Manhattan.”

It took Jeff some time to get through to the right floor, the right nurse’s station. Tish was in surgery, he was told, her injuries quite serious, but the nurse wouldn’t elaborate. Trying to stay in control of his emotions, Jeff scrubbed a hand across his face. “I’ve got to go there,” he told East as he hung up.

His dad handed him a sheet of paper. “You’re booked on the red-eye out of Los Angeles International Airport. Get ready and I’ll drive you to the airport.”

Jeff saw the concern in East’s eyes and it was almost his undoing. He took a step closer and felt his father’s arms close around him in a comforting hug. “I can’t lose her, Dad. Not again.”

“You won’t, son. Go to her, let her know you’re there. It could make all the difference.” East stepped back, then let him go.

Jeff hurried to his room, his mind racing, his heart heavy.



“Why can’t we get this guy?” Jeff asked, frustration evident in every word. Seated beside East in his fortified ATV as his dad expertly maneuvered the steep, winding roads of the mountainous area where Condor was located, he wanted to lash out at something, someone. “SPEAR agents have been chasing this traitor all over the globe for months and no one’s come close to capturing or killing him. How long are we expected to keep this up, until all our best people are maimed or dead?”

In direct contrast, Easton’s voice was calm, reasonable, reassuring. “I understand how you feel. Actually, several agents have come close to capturing Simon, but…”

“Close only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades,” Jeff muttered, then realized what he’d just said. A hand grenade was similar to a bomb and a bomb was what had put Tish in the hospital.

“It’s hard to be patient when someone you care for is involved,” East continued in the same quiet tone and Jeff was reminded of all that his father had gone through when he’d been held captive. “You’ve been with SPEAR quite a while now, Jeff. You’re aware how treacherous and devious this man is. But we have to keep trying until we get him. It’s a matter of national importance.”

Jeff let out a shuddering breath. “I know and I’m sorry. I’m just so damn worried. I don’t even know if she made it through the surgery.”

“Use your cell phone. It’s been several hours. Call the hospital again.”

Jeff pulled out his cell, the special phone all SPEAR agents carried. The system was established by orbiting satellites, not dependent on normal cells, so he could talk to anyone on the planet at any time. The signal also was digitalized and encoded so no one else could unscramble the conversation.

When he finished his call and disconnected, he drew in a deep, calming breath. “She made it through surgery and she’s in recovery. She’ll be transferred to the intensive care unit from there. But it’s still touch-and-go.” He turned toward East. “Did you talk with the hospital earlier?”

“Yes, while you were showering. I let them know who you were and that you were to have top clearance for visitation. They didn’t much like it, but then hospital personnel usually don’t like outside interference, even from government agents. However, they promised to cooperate.” East entered the freeway and headed for LAX.

They drove in silence for several miles, each lost in his own troubled thoughts. Finally, Jeff spoke, a sudden rush of emotion clogging his throat. “I thought, after Australia, that we’d have a chance, but we didn’t have enough time.”

A muscle clenched in East’s jaw. “When there’s a crisis, there’s never enough time.”

“And there’s always a crisis somewhere.” Jeff sounded defeated, which wasn’t like him. Normally, he was upbeat, hopeful. But this wasn’t a normal circumstance.

“You can always quit SPEAR,” East suggested, then held his breath.

Jeff took a moment to consider that. “You know as well as I do that if I were a quitter, I wouldn’t be here at all.”

His father sent him a look of understanding, of love and gratitude. “Nor would I, son.”

Minutes later, East pulled up at the boarding terminal and stopped. He shoved the gearshift into Park as Jeff climbed out and grabbed his leather overnight bag. East walked around the vehicle, stopped in front of his son and gazed into his eyes. The look held and seemed to say volumes. “Keep me informed, will you?”

“I will. Give my love to Ally and the baby. I’m sorry I didn’t get a chance to say goodbye.” East and Alicia’s baby girl, Annie, had been born three days ago; mother and child were still in the hospital.

“She’ll understand,” East assured him.

Jeff hugged his father tightly for several long seconds, then picked up his bag and walked toward the double doors, not looking back. He didn’t want his dad to see the moisture in his eyes.



The first-class ticket East had arranged got Jeff a comfortable aisle seat on the big jumbo jet in the second row. After takeoff, he stretched out his long legs and accepted a cup of black coffee from the flight attendant, but refused the snack she offered. He didn’t need food. He needed a miracle.

A bomb blast. Good Lord, how could anyone survive such a thing? Myriad questions whirled around in his brain. How close had Tish been to the blast? How extensive were her injuries? What had she been operated on for? What was her revised prognosis? The nurse he’d spoken with had said, “It’s still touch-and-go.” What exactly did that mean?

Jeff had two more years of medical training left, planning to specialize in trauma injuries, the choice SPEAR felt would be most beneficial to the organization. Well, a bomb injury certainly qualified as a trauma. Yet he had no idea what kind of injuries she’d sustained.

Just a few weeks ago in Australia, he’d treated SPEAR agent Lise Meldrum for a gunshot wound to the shoulder. Simple things like that didn’t throw him. But bomb injuries? Most doctors never even run across such a thing in a lifetime of practice. But then, most doctors don’t work for secret government agencies.

The coffee was hot and strong. Jeff drank half a cup before leaning his head back and shutting his eyes. He knew he couldn’t sleep so he might as well enjoy the caffeine. Who could sleep when his imagination had him picturing all sorts of terribly traumatic injuries? Behind closed eyelids, scenes past and present, along with future possibilities, vied for his attention.

Actually, on second thought, Lise’s injury hadn’t exactly been cut-and-dried. The bullet had exited through the other side, but had come perilously close to the pulmonary artery causing a great deal of bleeding. Lise also had difficulty breathing because the passage to her lungs was involved. A grateful Russell Devane, another SPEAR agent who’d fallen in love with Lise, had thanked Jeff profusely for saving her life. The doctor at the hospital where they’d finally taken Lise also had praised his work.

But that was still small potatoes compared with bomb injuries, he was certain. He’d heard through the grapevine that Russell and Lise were getting married. Not for the first time, he wondered if it was possible in this crazy business to be happily married? East and Ally seemed content, but they were only on the fringes of SPEAR now, managing Condor.

Restless, he leaned toward the window and gazed out into the dark night. It was dark with not a cloud visible. Jeff reached for the phone on the seat back in front of him and dialed the New York hospital. After much transferring about, he finally was able to talk with the recovery room nurse. But all he learned was that Tish was resting comfortably considering the circumstances.

What the hell did that mean?

Disconnecting, Jeff vowed that when he became a full-fledged doctor, he would never be vague with relatives of his patients. If only they knew what they put people through, they’d be more forthcoming. Maybe.

Sitting back, he drained his coffee cup and again closed his eyes. The overhead cabin lights had been dimmed and the half dozen other passengers in first class appeared to be settling down for some shut-eye. If he couldn’t sleep, at least he could rest his body, Jeff decided, and pushed his seat back as far as it would go. He tried closing his eyes and emptying his mind, but it didn’t work. Awake or asleep, he pictured Tish, her lovely smile, her wonderful laugh.

Sighing, he let himself remember the summer day last year that he’d seen her for the first time….

Red Rock Ranch, previous summer

Jeff leaned against the corral fence, one booted foot propped on the bottom rung, lazily watching the horses on a hot August afternoon. Red Rock Ranch in northern Arizona was the perfect place for him to recuperate after his ordeal in Idaho, or so East had said. His dad had told him to do as little or as much as he wanted, not to push himself, to let his psyche heal.

However, Jeff had arrived only yesterday and he’d already discovered that he wasn’t very good at doing nothing.

Red Rock was another of SPEAR’s legitimate businesses, a working cattle ranch that also provided adventure vacations for monied tourists. But more importantly, it was a SPEAR training site ideally situated in the rugged mountains surrounding the ranch. It was beautiful country with its freshwater streams, the isolated location that brought about pitch-black nights, the silence broken only by the animals nearby.

And there were plenty of them, two thousand head of Brahman-cross cows, twenty bulls and a couple dozen horses. The nearest town was two hours away on a rough dirt road scarcely navigable without an ATV. There were several of those around, too, and even an ultralight aircraft the manager used to fly out each morning over the 120 acres to check the water supply, fences and livestock. It was a huge operation and Jeff had learned to respect the dozen or so ranch hands who kept things running smoothly.

He eased his hat back farther on his blond head and glanced up to watch a hawk chase a low-flying quail. He’d only visited Red Rock once before in his late teens, but the manager, Slim Huxley, remembered him well. That summer, Slim had taught him to ride a horse, how to spot fresh mountain lion tracks and the best way to round up cattle to herd them to a different pasture, and a whole lot more. East had commented when Jeff had returned to Condor that fall that he’d sent away a boy and gotten back a man, for Jeff had filled out and muscled up.

Suddenly the lazy afternoon quiet was broken by the sound of a galloping horse coming closer. Jeff turned his head in the direction of the open pastureland off to the left.

She was some distance away yet, astride a chestnut mare, her short dark hair flying about her face. With the pounding of each hoof, red dust sprayed from the dry rocky soil beneath the short, tough grass. Luckily there were no trees in her path for she was riding at a pretty good clip, heading for the barn right behind him. Straightening, he watched her approach.

Now he could tell she was as one with the horse, leaning forward over the thick neck, grasping handfuls of coarse mane. She was a small woman, yet she seemed totally un-afraid of the huge beast. Fascinated, Jeff wondered who she was, this woman who rode so confidently. He was aware there were about twenty tourists staying at the ranch just now, but none that he’d seen ride like that.

The mare sensed the ride was nearly over and seemed reluctant to stop even though they were nearing the barn. Finally, the big horse gave in and moved into a canter, then a walk. Moments later, both mare and rider came to a halt near him. The woman swung out of the saddle with a move so graceful that he knew she’d done it many times before.

Jeff studied her in silence, taking his time to admire. She was small and feminine-looking despite the outsize man’s shirt and snug jeans she wore. Her wind-tossed hair was a rich brown, glossy, curling forward at her chin. Her face was flushed from her ride, a lovely olive complexion hinting at a Mediterranean heritage, her features fine-boned. Her mouth had a full lower lip that immediately had him wondering how it would feel to kiss her.

Jeff leaned against the fence and waited for her to notice him.

“Good girl,” the woman told the mare as she stroked the horse’s hide. The horse bobbed her big head up and down, then stretched to nuzzle the rider. The woman let out a husky laugh, then swung about and spotted Jeff for the first time. She shook back her hair while her chocolate-brown eyes slowly took inventory of him from his black Stetson to his leather boots, lingering just a heartbeat too long on his midsection.

Suddenly she smiled and Jeff felt his heart do a somersault.

“You must be new,” she said in a voice as husky as her laugh. She stepped closer, held out her hand. “I’m Tish Buckner.”

He straightened, took her hand, slender but capable, and felt a jolt skitter up his spine. Her fingers trembled in his grasp and he knew she felt something, too. He watched nerves dance in her surprised gaze, saw her try to conceal her reaction.

“Jeff Kirby,” he said, relieved that his voice hadn’t cracked since he felt like a pubescent teenager meeting his first girl. He could easily stand here holding her hand and staring into those fathomless brown eyes forever, he decided. Lord, but she was beautiful.

“Nice to meet you,” Tish replied, then tugged her hand free of his, but kept her eyes on his face. She studied him a moment longer, then raised her firm chin that hinted at a stubborn streak and handed him the mare’s reins. “Would you cool her down, please? Her name’s Belladonna and she belongs in stall 10.”

It took a moment for Jeff to realize she thought he was one of the ranch hands. Amusement bubbled up inside him, but he struggled not to react to her somewhat haughty, lady-of-the-manor attitude. A natural mistake, he supposed, seeing as how he was hanging around the corral wearing worn jeans, a denim work shirt and scuffed boots.

“Yes, ma’am,” he said, smiling down at her. He was half a foot taller at the very least. He had a sudden urge to reach over and touch her shiny hair, to watch the heat move into those big eyes. Or would they turn cool and frosty? he wondered. He decided to find out.

Moving one step closer, Jeff raised his hand and tucked a loose strand of her hair behind her ear, then let his fingers linger in the softness. He watched the sun get caught in her eyes and fleck the brown with gold as she narrowed them at him, then stepped back.

“If you value your hand, you won’t do that again,” Tish said, her voice suddenly cold as a mountain stream.

So she was skittish, like a newborn filly. She didn’t seem like the average city-bred tourist who came to Red Rock for a ranch vacation, Jeff thought. She was too good a horsewoman and definitely not interested in a flirtation with a cowboy. No rings on her fingers, he noticed, so she probably wasn’t attached. If she was a SPEAR agent, he hadn’t heard of her. His gaze slid to her mouth, that full lip that seemed to invite a man to explore. No, he definitely hadn’t met her before. He’d have remembered that mouth. He’d love to question her, but he decided it might be more fun to allow her to think he was a hired hand. For now.

Jeff dropped his hand, gave her a lazy smile. “No offense meant, ma’am. I guess you don’t like to be touched.” It was his turn to narrow his gaze, as if sizing her up. “But maybe you just need to be touched by the right man.”

Now there was fire in her eyes as she stiffened. Without another word, she turned and caressed the mare’s flank, noticeably angry when she saw that her hand wasn’t steady. “See you tomorrow, baby,” she whispered to Belladonna. Turning, Tish walked away, her back ramrod straight, her shoulders obviously tense.

Jeff watched her go until she was out of sight, then led the mare to the side pasture to walk her awhile before wiping her down after that vigorous run. “Sure wish you could talk, Belladonna,” Jeff commented. “I’d love to hear all about that lady.”



Red Rock Ranch consisted of several outbuildings including separate barns for milking cows and newborn calves, others for insemination and birthing as well as horse stables. There was also a large bunkhouse where the ranch hands lived and an adjacent mess hall that had its own cook. The tourists vacationed in a luxurious three-story building that offered spectacular views from deluxe suites. Their dining room took up nearly half of the lower floor.

SPEAR agents stayed in the two-story main house with large, homey rooms with private baths on the top floor. On the lower level was a rustic lobby with slate flooring, a conference room, the manager’s office and a great room with a huge stone fireplace, comfortable furniture, a large-screen television and a full wall of bookcases filled to over-flowing.

There was also the dining room which could easily rival that of a five-star hotel. Breakfast was served from five to ten, lunch from twelve to two and dinner was a leisurely affair available from six on into the evening. In between, snacks could be had by phoning the kitchen and would be delivered to the agent’s room, provided Elsa Winchester, the cook, liked you. All others had best stay out of her way, for she ran her kitchen with an autocratic hand.

Jeff deliberately hadn’t gone down for the evening meal. The first reason was that Elsa was a terrific cook. Too terrific. He’d had a big breakfast and a mammoth lunch, at Elsa’s insistence, since she remembered him from his earlier visit and still thought of him as a growing boy. If he added a huge dinner, he’d be taking in as many calories as the cowhands who spent twelve or fourteen hours using up energy while he was doing precious little to work off gigantic meals. The last thing he wanted was to balloon up, so he decided to drop by around the time he figured most of the agents would be either finished or having coffee.

The second reason was that he’d mosied over to the tourist quarters and discovered that Tish Buckner wasn’t staying there. Next he’d cornered the clerk at the front desk of the main house for the real lowdown. Naomi Star had red hair, thick glasses, an infectious smile and knew everyone and everything that went on at the ranch. Jeff had turned on the charm and Naomi had revealed that Tish wasn’t married, was a very private person and, that as far as she knew, Tish was at Red Rock on vacation.

Armed with that knowledge, Jeff sauntered into the dining room around seven just as the sun was streaking the sky outside the cathedral-style windows with gold and orange and magenta strokes before it disappeared behind the mountains. He was in luck for Tish was there, seated between Slim Huxley, the ranch manager, and John Winters, a fortyish, dark-haired agent Jeff had only just met yesterday. The three other chairs at the table were vacant. Of the dozen tables in the room, only two others were occupied.

Tish was deep in conversation with Slim and didn’t notice Jeff’s arrival. Jeff walked to the side board, poured himself a cup of steaming coffee and slowly carried it over to Tish’s table.

Slim was the first to spot him and smiled a welcome. “Join us, won’t you, Jeff?” He glanced toward the swinging kitchen doors. “I know Elsa wouldn’t mind getting you something to eat.” Slim was nearly fifty with laugh lines around his eyes permanently etched into his tan face, a tall man with thinning sandy hair who never gained a pound no matter how much he ate.

“Thanks, Slim, but I’m not hungry.” Jeff pulled out a chair, sat down and greeted John before swinging his gaze to Tish. He saw that she looked puzzled and just a little suspicious.

“I don’t know if you’ve met Tish Buckner, Jeff,” Slim continued, “one of our agents who just arrived for a little R and R. Tish, this is Jeff Kirby. Or should I say Dr. Kirby?”

“Hello.” He smiled at Tish, waiting for her reaction.

“We met this afternoon,” Tish began, acknowledging him with a wry smile. “He’s the cowboy I asked to cool down my horse after a run.” The smile spread to her eyes, which were a shade of coffee brown this evening.

So she could laugh at herself, Jeff thought, pleased. By turning the joke on herself, she’d defrayed the embarrassment.

“You’re kidding!” Slim commented, grinning. “You thought he was a ranch hand?” He laughed out loud while John just smiled. “You’ll have to tell that one to East, Jeff.”

Sipping his coffee, Jeff watched her face, could almost hear the wheels turning in her mind. She was wearing a yellow silk blouse tucked into khaki slacks tonight and looked better than anything he’d seen on the dessert table.

“You’re related to Easton Kirby?” she asked, curiosity obviously getting the best of her.

“He’s my father,” Jeff said, then watched confusion wrinkle her brow as she did the math. He was aware that he looked older than twenty-four, but even if he hadn’t, it would be unlikely that East fathered him. “My adoptive father.”

Tish nodded. “I met East some years ago at Condor. He’s a wonderful man.”

“Damn right he is,” John Winters added, rising. “Saved my life back when we worked together years ago.” He reached in his shirt pocket, pulled out a pack of cigarettes. “’Scuse me, I’m going outside to grab a smoke.”

Was he the only one feeling the vibes across the table? Jeff wondered as he studied Tish. No, he could tell she felt something, too, the way she’d been looking at him from beneath thick lowered lashes. She dropped her gaze and picked up her cup to drink, then noticed it was empty.

“Can I get you a refill?” Jeff asked, pushing his chair back.

“No, thanks.” She rose, smiling at Slim. “I think I’ll turn in. Five o’clock comes around real fast.”

Slim leaned back in his chair. “I told you, Tish, you don’t need to get moving that early.”

“You promised me a ride in your plane tomorrow morning. I’ll be ready.”

“Okay, then,” Slim said. “Meet me at the hangar ’bout six.”

“Will do. Good night.” She stepped aside as Slim got up and walked toward the side door in the direction of his office, then she raised her eyes to Jeff. “Glad to have met you.”

“Same here. I’ll walk you to your room.”

A slight frown came and went on her forehead. “That’s not necessary, but thanks.”

“Sure it is,” he insisted, falling in step with her as she left the dining room. “Don’t you know there are mountain lions in these parts?”

She ignored that and briskly walked to the elevators in an attempt to discourage him, but Jeff’s long strides had no trouble keeping up. The doors of the car closed, locking them into a forced intimacy.

Instead of facing the front, Jeff faced her. “So, where are you from?”

“The East Coast.”

“Where in the East?”

“New York.” It was apparent that his closeness made her feel uncomfortable, as if he were invading her space. When he raised a hand as if to touch her, she swatted it aside, turning to glare at him. “Didn’t you think I meant what I said earlier about that hand of yours?”

Jeff shrugged, then gave her his best boyish grin. “I like to live dangerously.”

“I wouldn’t if I were you. There’s not much call for a one-handed doctor.” The elevator doors slid open and she stepped around him and out, marching to her room.

Jeff followed and almost bumped into her when she stopped abruptly at her door. “Look at that, we’re neighbors. I’m right across the hall.”

“How fortunate for me. If I need a doctor, I’ll be sure to call.” She slid her card key in, pushed open the door. “Good night, Dr. Kirby.”

His hand on her wrist, gentle but firm, stopped her. “Wait just a minute, Tish. Why are you running off like this? It’s only seven-thirty.” He could feel her pulse go into overtime beneath his thumb as he held her loosely, his eyes on hers as he noticed that she didn’t pull away. “Why don’t we go for a walk? The stars in an Arizona sky night are fantastic.”

Tish let out a long sigh. “Look, we should get something said between us right now. I’m not interested and…”

He stepped closer, so close he could inhale her fragrance. She smelled like wildflowers he’d once picked on a hillside. “Do you want me to show you just how interested I think you are?” Before she could respond, he dropped her wrist and reached up to glide two fingers along her cheek and down the silk of her throat, and watched her eyes darken, her breathing go shallow. Having made his point, he stepped back so she wouldn’t feel as if he had her penned in.

She didn’t move, looking as if she were stunned at her own reaction. Finally, she eased inside and, without a word, quietly closed the door.

Jeff knew she was still there, on the other side of the door, probably leaning against it. You’re interested, Tish, and so am I, he thought, then walked to his own room.




Chapter 2


The man across the plane aisle was snoring loud enough to wake the dead, Jeff thought as he sat up, jolted from his mind meanderings. He shifted in his seat, trying to get comfortable. Apparently the flight attendant, a tall blonde somewhere in her thirties, noticed Jeff’s restlessness and walked over.

“Would you care to change your seat, sir?” she whispered, glancing toward the snoring passenger.

“Thanks, but I’m not sleeping anyway.” He handed her his cup from the tray table. “A little more coffee would be great.”

“Certainly.” Silently, she made her way to the galley, returning minutes later with a steaming cupful. “Can I get you anything else? A pillow or blanket?”

Jeff shook his head and smiled his appreciation before tasting the hot brew. As someone in the medical field, he knew he shouldn’t drink so much coffee, but during the long hours at the hospital, at times the caffeine was all that kept him going. That and thoughts of Tish.

Leaning back again, Jeff closed his eyes, thinking back again to that fateful week they’d met in Arizona….



From that first evening on, he couldn’t keep his eyes off her. From the next table over at meals or pausing along the corral fence to study her as she worked a horse or gazing across the campfire one evening as several of the agents and guests gathered to sing songs with the majestic mountains in the background. He kept watch and smiled at her occasionally, but rarely spoke and never moved close enough to touch her. Though he wanted to…badly.

For her part, Tish kept him in her sights as well, sometimes openly staring, periodically tossing a glance over her shoulder as she walked away, her eyes occasionally searching a room for him. Now and again, he’d catch her gaze locked to his face, her expression thoughtful and contemplative. She made no move to come nearer, though she seemed on the brink of doing so.

He liked the way she carried herself, straight and proud, her demeanor that of a tall woman though she was no more than five-four or five. He liked the way the setting sun would get caught in the brown of her hair and turn it auburn. He liked the way her smile got all warm and fuzzy when she talked with the two children of a tourist couple.

She’d even arranged to give the older child, Luke, a boy of about twelve, riding lessons. He was gangly and awkward but, in no time, Tish had him smiling and almost confident astride one of the gentle mares. Afterward, he’d thanked her and started back toward his mother, then he’d impulsively run back for a fierce hug. Jeff had seen the surprised look of pleasure on Tish’s face before she’d turned aside.

Then there was that hot afternoon, about a week after they’d met, the day the new calves were branded. It was a miserable job that called for agility, strength and a certain hardening of the heart when the calves bawled and struggled and fought. Branding was not Jeff’s favorite job. He’d been told by East to do only the things he wanted to do while healing and regaining his strength, but he hadn’t turned down the job boss when he’d all but challenged him to help out. Jeff knew he was the youngest agent there, mostly inexperienced and unseasoned. He also guessed that the cowhands were out to test him, to see what he was made of.

Four hours into it and Jeff was ready to drop. Muscles he didn’t know he had hurt like hell, sweat was pouring into his eyes and only half the day was over. Mac was the job boss, the one releasing the calves from the chute, aiming them over to Jeff and three others in the corral with the branding irons. Mac was a mean one, short, bandy-legged and prematurely bald so he never took off his hat, and he had the temperament of a jailhouse guard. No one liked him, including Jeff.

That day, Mac was mainly picking on Teddy, a new hand who couldn’t have been shaving long, looking no older than nineteen. Mac kept yelling criticisms that the kid wasn’t fast enough, strong enough, good enough. The dressing down in front of half a dozen cowboys hanging on the fence finally took its toll on the kid and he looked near tears. That’s when Mac moved in for the kill, shouting that Teddy was useless, finally grabbing the branding iron from him, looking for all the world like he was going to press the fire-hot metal end onto Teddy’s tender flesh before he tossed it aside with a disgusted grunt.

To this day, Jeff didn’t know what came over him. Certainly, he was no hero and no match for Mac who outweighed him by a good thirty pounds. But during the years he’d been a runaway he’d run into his fair share of bullies and hated them all. Standing behind Mac, he dropped his own iron and yelled to get his attention.

Mac’s thick neck scarcely moved as he turned his head toward Jeff. “What’d you say?”

“I said leave him alone,” Jeff answered, his eyes angry, his stance challenging, feet apart.

Mac smiled and it wasn’t pretty. Then he took a step toward Jeff. “And who’s going to make me?”

“I am,” Jeff answered, and let loose with a right to the man’s gut followed by a left to his jaw that sent him sprawling, narrowly missing the fire where the branding irons were heated. Mac scrambled to his feet, fire in his eyes. He came charging at Jeff like a bull, but Jeff was younger and faster, so he moved aside in time. Furious now, Mac spun around and smacked a thick fist into Jeff’s shoulder, but Jeff held his ground.

The cowhands yelled encouragement but Jeff just wanted to end it. He waited until Mac came thundering close again, then let loose with a sucker punch to his already injured jaw. Mac went down like a felled tree. He tried to get up, flailing his arms halfheartedly, lifted his head, then fell back, out cold.

Jeff yanked off his gloves. “I’m through for today,” he said, and walked out of the corral. The boy he’d rescued was too stunned and probably too frightened to move, but the guys along the fence cheered and those nearest him patted his shoulder as he made his way to the barn. He was hot, tired and disgusted with himself.

He’d done exactly what East had repeatedly warned him not to do, settled something with his fists instead of his brain. He’d been young those years he’d lived on the run and the only way he’d survived was to be a street fighter out of necessity when bigger runaways had tried to take advantage. But he’d given that up ten years ago, or so he’d thought until Mac had gone too far.

Nearing the barn, Jeff heard running footsteps, then felt a tap on his shoulder and turned to see Teddy, looking awkward and shy. His crooked smile would have made an orthodontist’s hands twitch.

“Thanks,” he muttered, his face reddening.

Nodding, Jeff walked on and almost didn’t notice Tish standing in the doorway, in her eyes a new respect. Still, he marched on by, knowing he’d made a formidable enemy in Mac.

He went straight to his room, took a long, hot shower, then lay down on his bed, trying to rest his overtaxed muscles and his throbbing right hand. Ever since his ordeal of being buried alive, of not knowing if he’d ever see daylight again, he’d noticed that he had a much shorter fuse. He was grateful to be alive and wondered why others didn’t see what he saw, that each day was a gift. The petty arguments, the anger, the need to best someone smaller and younger, all of it made him see red. Jeff sighed, thinking he’d have to work on these sudden temper flare-ups or he’d become just like the bullies he disliked.

Feeling restless, he got up and tried watching television, but nothing held his interest. He flipped through a couple of magazines, but he didn’t feel like reading. Pacing, he thought of Tish Buckner and wondered why she showed signs of interest, yet only from a distance. And he wondered how he could change that.

Jeff hadn’t done a lot of dating, mostly because living at Condor with East when he’d been a teenager didn’t give him much opportunity. Except for school kids, the only people he’d spent time with had been SPEAR agents much older than he. And East had kept him on a fast track of learning, year-round classes to make up for studies he’d missed as a runaway, then college and finally med school where he spent the few free hours he had falling facedown on the bed, dead to the world with exhaustion.

Sure, there’d been a few women; after all, he wasn’t a monk. Enough so that he recognized that certain look in a woman’s eyes when she was sizing up a man, considering possibilities, wondering, imagining. That special male-female connection that is difficult to explain but is unmistakable to the parties involved.

And Tish Buckner was definitely sending out those signals.

Maybe he’d try getting her alone after dinner tonight, ask her to go for a walk, get to know her. Checking the time, Jeff saw that it was nearing six. He went back to the bathroom and took pains getting ready, combing his thick blond hair just so, choosing pressed chinos and a navy shirt, loafers instead of cowboy boots.

Patting shaving lotion on his face, he studied his image and spoke to the mirror. “That’s as good as it gets, folks,” then smiled at his flight of fancy. Was Tish causing him to talk to himself? he wondered as he grabbed his leather jacket and left his room.

She was already in the dining room, seated at Slim’s table for six as usual. Reggie Miller, a fortyish agent who thought of himself as God’s gift to women, was regaling two female agents and Tish with tales of his days as a lumberjack in the Pacific Northwest as Jeff took the last chair after filling his plate at the buffet table. There were greetings all around, though Reggie barely stopped in his recitation to nod toward him.

Apparently Reggie’s story had been quite funny since there was hearty laughter when he finished. Jeff concentrated on his food with occasional glances at Tish, biding his time.

“I heard about what you did at the branding,” Slim said in a quiet aside to Jeff. “I guess you loosened a couple of Mac’s teeth.” The normally taciturn manager grinned. “Wish I’d have seen that.”

“It’s about time someone punched out his lights,” Marge Collins on the other side of Jeff commented. “But I’d watch my back, Jeff. He’s a mean one.”

“I think Jeff can handle himself,” Tish said softly, her eyes on him.

“Then again, could’ve been a lucky punch,” Reggie said, anxious to turn the attention back to himself. “I did some boxing awhile back. That old one-two punch comes from street fighting, right, sonny?” he asked, his cool gaze on Jeff.

Every time he’d been around Reggie, the man had called him sonny even though he knew his name. It was a subtle put-down, but Jeff wasn’t about to rise to the bait tonight. One fight a day was more than enough. “Call it what you want, it worked.”

Reggie couldn’t think of a clever comeback, so he changed the subject to the ride up into the high country scheduled for the next day to deliver salt to the cows in the far pasture. “We could go together, Tish. It’s real pretty up there this time of year.”

Jeff heard her say something noncommittal before he turned to answer a question Slim had asked. The conversation shifted to other topics as they finished their meal. Finally, Reggie left the table to get his dessert and Jeff saw his chance. Sliding back his chair, he rose and walked around the table to Tish’s side.

“It’s a nice night,” he began, standing behind her chair, inhaling the fresh scent of her hair. “I was wondering if you’d like to go for a walk.”

“I’d like to, Jeff, but…”

“But she’s promised to take me on in a game of chess,” Reggie said as he returned with a generous slice of pie. “I don’t suppose you play, eh, sonny?”

For the second time that day, Jeff wanted to hit a man, and he wasn’t very happy about it. “Some other time then,” he said more curtly than he’d intended, and left the dining room.

He needed fresh air, Jeff decided, to be outside where he could walk off his anger and this pent-up energy. Detouring through the kitchen, he stopped to praise Elsa’s barbecued brisket while he snitched a couple of small carrots and apples. He stuffed them in the pockets of his jacket, gave the cook a quick hug and escaped.

Finally outdoors, he stood on the back porch, breathing in the fresh mountain air. He walked out toward the barns, then stopped, closed his eyes and listened. Here, away from the people and buildings, it was so different. The world was alive with sound—the muted gurgle of water rushing over stones in the nearby creek, the flutter of wings as a night bird flew by, crickets singing and small, furry creatures darting about in the underbrush. A distant owl sent up a protest as Jeff slapped at a mosquito.

He slipped on his jacket and strolled. From the barns came the sounds of a horse whinnying, probably a stallion picking up the scent of a mare.

Walking briskly, he headed for the stables, circling the entire structure before going inside. The horses were housed in a long aluminum building with stalls on either side and cement flooring on the center aisle plus overhead track lighting, now on dim as Jeff pushed open the sliding door. Thoroughly modern, all of Red Rock’s barns were electronically monitored by the ranch manager or his assistant so that it wasn’t necessary to have a person on hand to check on the animals at night. But the ranchers often wandered in to inspect their mounts or to tend to a sick cow or newborn calf.

Tonight, the horse stable appeared to be empty of humans, Jeff noted as he strolled down the center aisle. As he passed the stalls, he noticed ears twitch as the horses turned their big heads toward him, acknowledging his presence. One or two snuffle-guffed or snorted and from the far end came a short whinny. The combined scent of leather and animal hide wasn’t altogether unpleasant, he thought as he sauntered along, whispering a soft greeting to this one and that.

Snowflake, a two-year-old spirited white mare he’d ridden yesterday, bobbed her big head at him, inviting attention. “Okay, girl,” he said softly, “I see you.” He caressed her nose as she nuzzled him, sniffing out the treats in his pocket. Laughing, he gave her one of the carrots and walked on.

He spoke to a few more mares, reading their names from the metal plate attached to each stall door. Pausing at Belladonna’s stall, he greeted the big chestnut. “She gave you quite a workout again, eh, girl? Yeah, I saw you both and you looked like you were loving it.” He stroked her nose while the mare poked her way around toward his pocket. Funny how horses could ferret out a treat in moments.

“Has she been down here to see you tonight, Bella?” Jeff asked as he gave her an apple. “Or is she playing chess with that creep, all the while thinking of me?” He chuckled at that thought as he watched the mare’s big teeth make quick work of the apple. “Yeah, right.” With a last pat, he moved on down, heading for the males at the far end.

Domino, the black stallion he’d ridden earlier today, was restlessly pawing the floor of his stall. He let out a sharp whinny when he spotted Jeff and shook his proud head, ruffling his thick mane. “Yeah, I know how you feel, boy.”

Jeff wandered closer and saw the big horse settle down as he gave him an apple, though he was sure food wasn’t the stallion’s biggest problem. His back to the section he’d come from, he leaned on the door of the empty stall next to Domino’s. “Got a girlfriend down there you’d like a little time with?” he asked the stallion, male to male. “Is she playing hard to get?” Domino bobbed his big head as if in answer to his question. “Females! They’re like that, aren’t they, boy?”

Finished with the apple, Domino stuck his head over the half door, looking for more treats, able to smell them. “Greedy, aren’t you?” But Jeff gave him a carrot nonetheless.

Sighing, he gazed out the high window on the far wall, seeing the stars filling the night sky. “Not a good night to be alone, right, Domino?”

He shook his head, trying to figure things out. “All I wanted was to take a walk with her. Was that so much to ask? If I was smart, I’d walk away and forget her. But I keep seeing those big eyes, how the corners crinkled up when she poked fun at herself the other night, the way they warmed when she talked about liking Dad. Her skin is so soft, you know, and her hair makes a man want to bury his fingers in it. Then there’s her mouth and, well, hell! There’s just something about Tish Buckner that—”

Jeff heard a sound behind him and swung around.

She was standing on the opposite side two stalls down, one elbow propped on the door. She was wearing black slacks and a white silk blouse. She’d slipped on a rust-colored suede jacket against the desert night’s chill. Even in the dim light, he could see those steady brown eyes watching him, her expression unreadable.

He covered up his surprise by coughing into his fist. “I believe you’ve interrupted a private conversation, lady.” And he wondered just how much of his ramblings she’d heard.

Her lips twitched just the tiniest bit. “I apologize. I should leave you two guys alone.”

He waved a forgiving hand. “That’s all right.” He turned to Domino who practically had his nose buried in Jeff’s pocket. “Do you mind if she stays?” he asked as he gave the stallion another carrot. “No? Okay then.” He swung back to Tish. “You can stay.”

“That’s very kind of you both.” Still trying to hide a smile, she moved a bit closer. “Having a man-to-man conversation, are you? Or should I say, man-to-horse?”

Jeff leaned back on the empty stall across from her, propping his elbows on the half door. “More like man-to-stallion.” He gestured with his head in the direction of the mares. “They wouldn’t understand because they’re the problem. Females, that is.”

Looking as if she were enjoying this, she seemed to relax. “What sort of problem are you and Domino having with females? Maybe I can help. After all, I am a female.”

“Oh, yes, you are. I definitely noticed that.” He glanced at Domino who was noisily finishing his carrot. “You don’t mind if I bring her in on this, do you?” The stallion snorted. “I’ll take that as a yes.”

Jeff stepped across the cement walk, seemingly pondering a serious problem, and stopped alongside Tish. “Well, you see, Domino’s got this mare he’s interested in and he’d kind of like to play it out, get to know her, see where they could take it, you know? But she’s backing off, pretending she’s not interested, even though we think she is. Tell me, how would you handle that?”

Tish shoved her hands into the pockets of her jacket as she looked down at the floor littered with hay. “That’s a tough one. Did it occur to either of you that perhaps she’s really not interested and simply doesn’t want to hurt his feelings by just blurting it out?”

“No,” Jeff answered immediately. “We know she’s interested. Men know these things.” His smile was cocky now, challenging.

“I see.” Just that quickly, her eyes turned serious. “Maybe she is interested, a little, but she has a very good reason for not pursuing things. Maybe she’s very intent on her job and thinks it’s a mistake to get involved with a fellow worker.” Tish paused, then raised her eyes to his. “And maybe she’s simply not good at relationships and prefers to stay…unencumbered.”

“Unencumbered.” Jeff seemed to consider that. “Good word, but shucks, lady, I think what Domino had in mind was less an encumbrance and more like a thing. You know, a fling.”

Tish raised her dark brows. “A fling? Well, gentlemen, you should know that most females, human or horse, aren’t all that enthusiastic about flings. At least not mature females who are involved in serious careers.”

“Sooo,” Jeff drew out the word as he edged closer to her. “You don’t want another relationship or a fling. Hell, lady, no wonder we males can’t figure you women out.” In a move too fast for her to dodge, he took hold of the front of her blouse and tugged her up against his chest. “Maybe this will help you make up your mind.” And his mouth closed over hers.

Shocked by his own boldness, Jeff knew he couldn’t back down now. He’d never done more than shake hands with another agent, yet here he was tussling with one after meeting her mere days ago. His only excuse was that since the first moment he’d seen Tish Buckner, he’d been able to think about little else.

He’d been expecting her temper, perhaps a struggle, even possibly a kick in the shins followed by a hard slap. After all, she’d warned him twice to keep his hands to himself. Instead, she stiffened for several long seconds, holding herself rigid. Jeff ignored that and tried to coax her lips to respond while his hands at her back kneaded and caressed. Just when he was about to give up and give her this round, her lips began to move, to answer.

She opened to him, allowing his tongue entry to the secrets of her mouth, while her arms raised and enfolded him. White-hot passion exploded in a flash of heat, its intensity so unexpected that he nearly lost his footing. Her mouth was so soft, so giving and he drank from her like a desert walker who’d just found water. Her body was small and firm, and suddenly straining to get closer, the sweet friction driving him crazy.

Shaken, Jeff drew back, breathing hard.

Tish stared up at him, her eyes luminous in the dim lighting, looking as if she were fighting some internal demons, and losing the battle. She drew in a deep breath, yet it didn’t seem to calm her. Then, in an act that mimicked his, she grabbed his shirt front and pulled him to her, kissing him with an urgency that set his blood to boiling. There was no surrender in her kiss, but rather an acknowledgment of a need that perfectly matched his. She held him close, lost in passion newly awakened.

Just that quickly, Jeff began to fall over the edge and into love. How long had he subconsciously wanted and waited for such a woman? he wondered in the sluggish part of his brain still able to think. The scent and feel and taste of her wiped out the memory of every other woman he’d ever touched. His hands were trapped in the thickness of her hair as her sweet feminine fragrance wrapped around him. How could he have known she’d taste like all his wild dreams, exotic yet romantic at the same time? How could he have guessed she was the other half of him, just waiting to be found?

This time it was Tish who drew away, taking a step back, lowering her head and trying to regain control. Jeff ran a hand through his hair, unnerved to find it unsteady. He’d been wanting to kiss her, hoping to interest her, but even in his reckless dreams, he hadn’t expected either of them to react quite so fervently.

He saw Tish shake her head as if to clear her mind. He thought he ought to say something, though he wasn’t sure what that should be.

“Look, I…”

“No,” she said, “let me.” Eyes downcast, she seemed to search for the right words. “I—I obviously didn’t expect that to happen or that I’d—I’d—”

“Feel so much?” he offered.

Slowly, she lifted her eyes to his. “Yes, exactly. All the more reason why I need to keep my distance from you. I don’t have time for whatever it is you have in mind. SPEAR is very important to me and—”

“It’s important to me, too. But the attraction we feel for one another has nothing to do with SPEAR.”

As if she hadn’t heard, she went on. “SPEAR keeps me focused, grounded, and I need that. I don’t need a fling or a thing.”

Jeff decided to backtrack a bit, thinking perhaps he’d rushed her. “Why don’t we aim for friendship and see where that takes us?” Although he knew he was already light-years past a mere friendship.

Tish studied his face, then shook her head. “No, friendship isn’t what you have in mind. I can see it in your eyes. I’ve noticed for days now that you’ve been watching me and I know what you’re thinking.”

Caught between amusement and curiosity, he stepped closer. “Just what is it you think I want?”

She was quiet, thoughtful, then raised her chin. “More. More than I have to give.”

Jeff thought that over for a few seconds. “Someone hurt you badly, didn’t they?” he asked softly.

She crossed her arms over her chest. “Bad enough.”

“So you’re not going to let anyone get close enough to do it again. Is that about it?” When she didn’t reply, he had his answer. Again he invaded her space just enough so she had to look up at him. “What makes you think I’d hurt you, Tish?”

She gave him a long look. “Because you’re someone I could care for. Only people we care for can truly hurt us.”

Jeff wanted to ask who had hurt her, what had happened, but he didn’t want her to close up and back away. She’d admitted she could care for him. He’d work from there. There’d be time for questions later.

He disentangled her arms and took her hands on his. “I won’t hurt you. I swear. Let me prove it to you.”

She closed her eyes, as if fighting her own needs. “Please, Jeff. This can’t go anywhere.”

He smiled then, hoping to lighten her mood. “Honey, it already has.”

She took a deep breath, drawing courage. “No, I’m serious. I can’t get involved.”

His heart lurched. This didn’t sound like good news. “Are you going to tell me you’re married?” Naomi Star at the front desk had said Tish was single, but she could have been mistaken. The man who’d hurt her, was she still involved with him?

She stared into his eyes as the seconds ticked by. “Would it make a difference if I were?”

He didn’t answer her. Instead, he shifted her closer. “You couldn’t be happily married and kiss me like you just did.” But he waited, his breath backing up in his throat.

“You’re right about that and no, I’m not married,” she said at last.

Jeff visibly relaxed. “Then what? What’s wrong?”

She found the middle button of his shirt fascinating as she tried to tell him. “After you left, I talked privately to Slim and asked him a couple of questions about you. I wanted to know some things and—”

“I thought you were going to play chess with Wonder Boy.”

“I begged off from that.”

“Good move.” He squeezed her arms. “I don’t mind if you talked with Slim. I have nothing to hide. Did he say something that upset you?”

“Not really upset me, it’s just that he told me you’ve got a couple of years of residency to go yet and I’m sent all over the world by SPEAR. I don’t think long distance relationships work well and I’m committed to my work.”

“I’m committed to SPEAR, too. I don’t see what that has to do with anything.” Domino chose that moment to give out with a loud whinny. “See, he doesn’t either.”

“No, wait, Jeff, I—”

“No, Tish, you wait.” He leaned down, his face inches from hers. “When I kissed you just now, when you kissed me back, tell me honestly how you felt, and remember, Domino’s listening.”

Her features changed, lightened, as she remembered and a gentle blush warmed her face. “Honestly?” She looked hesitant, then apparently decided to tell him the truth. “I felt like the top of my head was going to take off, like I was walking into a hot, white flame, like nothing I’ve ever felt before.”

Jeff smiled. “So did I, and that’s something neither of us can fake. That’s all we need to know, how we feel now. The future will work out somehow. Let’s try friendship, companionship, doing fun things together. And let’s stop worrying so much.” He bent his head, needing to kiss her again, but her hand on his chest held him at bay.

“You’re going way too fast for me. We’ve just met and—”

“And we just kissed,” he said, interrupting her protests. “And nothing, nothing will ever be the same again. For either of us.”

She released an exasperated sigh. “You’re an incurable romantic, I see. Life isn’t that simple. We don’t all live happily ever after because we’re attracted to someone. I should know. I vowed two years ago that I’d never buy into that impossible dream again. Apparently you haven’t had to face life’s harsher realities yet.”

It wasn’t the way he’d intended to tell her, if at all. His difficult youth and more recent ordeal were, in fact, things he rarely mentioned. But apparently she thought he was the fair-haired prince born with a silver spoon who’d led a charmed life. He had to let her know.

“I suppose you’re right,” he said, stepping back. “I probably haven’t had too many harsh realities. Unless you’d call being born to two alcoholics who did me a big favor by abandoning me at age ten, although living on the streets for four years wasn’t exactly a day at the beach. Then there was a more recent incident where a couple of Simon’s men kidnapped me, buried me alive and left me to die there. Other than that, my life’s been a breeze.”

The shocked look on her face made him wish he hadn’t been quite so flip. But he wanted her to stop thinking of him as some pampered, privileged person.

“Oh, God, Jeff. Abandoned. Buried alive. I had no idea.”

“And I didn’t want to bring it up, but I need you to realize that we all have stuff in our past that makes us who we are. I’m well aware life isn’t simple and that we can’t all live happily ever after. But when someone comes along who touches us, I think it’s a mistake not to pursue that. Do you see where I’m coming from?”

She looked as if she wanted to ask more questions, but then seemed to decide now wasn’t the time. “Yes, I do.”

He shifted her closer back into his arms. “Good because you can run from me, but you can’t hide.”

Finally, her smile was genuine. “I don’t want to run or hide from you. But I would like to ask you something.”

“Anything,” he said and meant it.

“Would you kiss me like that again?”

“Oh, lady,” Jeff murmured as he lowered his mouth to hers.



They hung around the horse barn a while longer, lingering over kisses that set their blood heating. Only the night clerk was awake downstairs when they’d finally made their way into the main building, the lights on low. His arm around her shoulders, Jeff walked Tish to her room, where they both paused in the dim hallway.

“I don’t want to let you go,” Jeff whispered, his hands on her waist, his lips nuzzling her neck.

Tish seemed to be struggling, wanting to be with him yet feeling she shouldn’t begin something she couldn’t finish. “Me, either,” she finally admitted.

He eased back and studied her fine features now that his eyes had adjusted to the near darkness. “You seem afraid. Why?”

“Because I’m getting in too deep too quickly, something I promised myself I’d never do again.”

“Do you want to talk about it?” Maybe if she told him about the person who’d hurt her, she’d feel better. They could go into her room, talk in the sitting area, though it might tax his resolve to not touch her.

“No,” she said quickly. Then more softly, “No. Maybe one day, but not now.” She raised a hand to touch his hair, then trailed her fingertips along his cheeks and chin. Leaning back, her gaze stayed on his face. “You have the most incredible green eyes. It’s the first thing I noticed about you.”

“Not my manly physique?”

She smiled. “That’s not bad, either, but, no, your eyes. They’re such a vibrant shade in the daylight, then they turn to emerald at night. I admit that I’m jealous.”

“You needn’t be. Your eyes could be any color and still be beautiful.”

Her expression turned shy. “I wasn’t fishing.”

“I know. Still, I have to tell you, it wasn’t your eyes I noticed first.”

Suddenly wary, she looked up. “All right, tell me what.”

“The way you rode that mare, like the two of you were one. You impressed me and everyone else watching. Where’d you learn to ride like that?” It seemed to Jeff that a shadow crossed over her features, then was gone just as quickly.

“Upstate New York where I was raised. My family belonged to a country club and a hunt club. By the time I was ten, I was competing.”

“Ah, the blue bloods. I suppose you went to Ivy League schools. Must be nice, dear old Dad having tons of money.” This time he couldn’t mistake the frosty look that she struggled to hide.

She turned within his arms, dug out her key and unlocked her door. “I should say good night.”

He’d hit a nerve, Jeff decided. Something else to delve into another day. The past clings to all of us, he knew.

“Not without a good-night kiss,” he said, turning her back, placing her arms on his shoulders and taking her mouth.

If her mouth had cooled, it took but moments for it to heat up again beneath his seeking lips. Jeff molded her small frame to his with his big hands at her back. He felt his senses surge at the feel of that soft female body against his. He wanted nothing more than to shove open her door, follow her inside and slowly strip off all her clothes before moving to her big double bed.

But alas, SPEAR frowned on its agents cohabiting openly. So, although it cost him, he reluctantly stepped back. “See you tomorrow?” he asked, his voice husky.

She nodded vaguely and drifted inside.

Jeff heard the lock click, then turned to enter his own room across the hall. An ice-cold shower might be in order, he decided.




Chapter 3


Jeff awoke with a start, surprised he’d fallen asleep at all. Feeling stiff, he unfastened his seat belt and got up, glancing around the first-class section of the plane. The lights were on dim and the other five passengers all appeared to be in dreamland. The man across the aisle was still snoring, but not as loudly. A mother and daughter in the last row were cuddled together, snoozing. And a young couple who appeared to be newlyweds snuggled under a blanket, the woman’s head on her companion’s shoulder.

Stretching his cramped muscles, Jeff’s gaze stayed on the young couple, envying their togetherness. He and Tish had had so little time together to just be with one another. So many things had interfered—his hospital duties, SPEAR obligations, everyday things that kept them apart. Small wonder their relationship had been rocky.

Walking to the front, Jeff nodded to the flight attendant and went into the small compact lavatory. He splashed cold water on his face then dried off with a paper towel. He debated about shaving, then decided that could wait. Checking his watch, he saw they had two more hours left before landing. Impatience ate at him, but there was nothing he could do to hurry things along.

Resuming his seat, he glanced out the window and saw it was still dark out. A man of action, he’d always hated waiting. Not knowing how Tish was doing added to his unease. He picked up the phone to call the hospital again, then tucked it away, deciding that he didn’t want to irritate the staff by calling too frequently.

Finally settling back, he let his mind roam, remembering those early weeks with Tish, hoping the memory of their good times would sustain him during this time of uncertainty….



From that first kiss in the barn that summer evening at the Red Rock Ranch, Jeff had known Tish was the woman for him. He didn’t know how he knew; he simply did. Not a day since had he questioned that fact. He’d simply accepted it. She was the one.

But he’d known better than to let her see the depth of his feelings. She was skittish, wary, cautious in everything she said to him, in her reactions to him. He’d have to go slowly, he told himself. But the need to make her his had burned within him, coloring every aspect of their budding relationship. It had taken all of his control to rein in his needs and put hers first.

The morning after their first kiss in the barn, he awakened early. He was anxious for the day to begin, so he could see her, touch her, talk with her. Only when he’d gone down to breakfast, even though it was not yet seven, Slim was the only one in the dining room.

Sipping his coffee, Jeff sat down. “Where is everyone this morning?” he asked, trying to be casual.

“They left early, a couple of our agents going with a few hands to round up strays that wandered away from the herd. I spotted several from the plane yesterday when I went up, so I asked for volunteers.” Slim dipped the last of his toast into the remaining egg yolk and popped it into his mouth.

Jeff thought that over, kicking himself mentally for not rising earlier. “Who were the agents?” he asked, fully expecting Tish to be among them. Something had been mentioned about the ride last night at dinner, but he hadn’t paid much attention.

“Mmm, let’s see. John and Tanya are the only agents. Oh, and Tish. They were going with Derek, Jim and Pete, the cowhands familiar with that range. Kind of a rugged area.” Slim used his napkin to wipe along the edges of his mustache.

Why hadn’t Tish mentioned this trip to him last night? Jeff wondered. Had she decided they needed a little distance after their heated encounter? Or had the trip slipped her mind? She might also have gone on impulse. He drank more coffee, studying Slim and wondering how to find out what he wanted to know without arousing too much suspicion.

“Just for the day, you mean?” Jeff asked.

Slim finished his coffee before answering. “Three or four days, I’d imagine. It would take six or seven hours of riding just to reach the winter range.” His weathered brow furrowed as he looked at Jeff. “Why do you want to know?”

He shrugged, trying to look nonchalant. “Just curious. Not much going on here.” He glanced out the window, saw it was a sunny day, though probably cool. “Too nice to stay indoors, eh?”

Behind his hand cupping his mouth, Slim grinned. “I can tell you how to get where they’re going. If you’re interested, that is.”

Jeff tried to look as if the idea had just occurred to him. “Well, if you think they’ll need another hand.”

“Couldn’t hurt. You can carry a message to Justin. He’s the cowboy who’s been up there three weeks now. I just got a call from his wife and you can tell him her checkup went well, baby’s fine and definitely not due for another three weeks. He’ll be relieved next week and home in plenty of time for the birthing.”

Jeff knew that only one cowhand was assigned to keep watch on the herd in the mountainous region and that the men took turns on a rotating basis, usually four weeks at a time. “Will do.” Delivering the message would give him an excuse for showing up.

Slim took a small notebook out of his pocket and began drawing a map with a stubby pencil. “Good. I know he’s worried about that baby. It’s his first.” Slim labeled several trails. “This is the route to the winter pasture. Won’t be long and we’ll be herding them back down here. Another couple weeks. You’ll recall the passage once you start out ’cause landmarks haven’t changed all that much since you spent time here.” He tore out the sheet and handed it to Jeff. “Go get her, son.”

He should have known he couldn’t hide anything from Slim. Looking sheepish, Jeff took the map and stuffed it in his shirt pocket.

“Stop in the kitchen and have Elsa fix you up some food. And be sure to take your bedroll and a blanket. Gets mighty cold up there at night.”

“Thanks again, Slim.”



The way to the winter range was scenic at the beginning, Jeff thought as he rode Domino along the riverbed through desert country with plenty of browse and grass. But the way soon became treacherous with the trail narrowing to a path only a surefooted horse could follow. Domino was that kind of stallion, having lived all his life on Red Rock so he was familiar with every trail, bramble and bush.

Riding him, Jeff felt secure that the horse knew the way even if he hadn’t had Slim’s map. He hurried the big stallion as best he could on the rugged terrain, well aware that the others had a two-hour head start on him. Then again, they probably hadn’t been hard riding since there was no rush to reach the high country. The hands might even have taken off ahead, letting the three agents follow at their leisure. At least, Jeff hoped that was the case so he could catch up with them more easily.

Leaving the creek bed, he saw fresh mountain lion tracks and hoped the big cat was off somewhere sleeping since they did most of their prowling at night. Nevertheless, his rifle was securely in place by his saddlebags. The sky was a deep blue with hardly a cloud visible and there was a nip to the morning air. The temperature had been about fifty at the ranch but had cooled as he climbed.

On open land at last, he urged Domino to speed up as he passed a butte with a huge pile of rocks on top. Red rocks which gave the area and the ranch its name, the soil rich with minerals. The wind had picked up and had Jeff securing his hat on his head. He stopped after another hour to let the stallion have a drink from a creek and to rest a bit while he chewed on some beef jerky, having missed breakfast in his haste to get going. Perhaps it was his imagination, but Jeff could swear he heard the muted bawling of calves not far ahead, the sound carried on the wind. He drank some water, then reined the big horse around and set off again.

They rode another hour, Jeff pacing the stallion so as not to wear him out too soon. Finally, Domino snorted and bobbed his big head as he sniffed the air.

“What do you smell, boy?” Jeff asked, stroking his long neck. “I’ll bet there are mares up ahead.” With his knees, he urged Domino on.

Another half an hour and the whinny of horses could be heard clearly, for the mares had picked up the stallion’s scent. The gentle mooing of cattle drifted to Jeff as well. Even though he’d been climbing steadily, the sun had warmed the temperature to near sixty, he estimated. Checking Slim’s map, he saw that he was close.

A few minutes later, he rounded a bend and saw three horses tethered to a juniper tree that provided spotty shade for the agents sprawled beneath having their lunch. John Winters was the first to look up.

“Hey, Jeff. I didn’t know you were joining us.” Seated on the ground alongside his hat, John squinted up as Jeff swung down off Domino.

“Last minute decision,” Jeff said, walking Domino over to a second tree upwind from the mares and tying him to a strong limb.

Walking toward the three of them, he greeted Tanya and then looked over at Tish. She was studying him, trying to figure out his real motive in following them here, he was certain. He sat down opposite her and took an apple out of his jacket pocket. “Slim wanted me to deliver a message to Justin about his wife.”

“Mmm-hmm,” John said, a knowing grin on his face. He gathered their trash and moved toward his horse, stuffing crumpled paper into his saddlebag. “We’re about ready to head out. You need to rest awhile?” he asked Jeff.

Chewing on his apple, Jeff shook his head. “No, I’m all set.” He watched Tanya stroll over to her mare before turning to Tish. “How are you this morning?”

“Why are you here?” she asked so softly he had to bend closer to catch her words. “And don’t give me that nonsense about a message for Justin.”

Feigning indignation, Jeff gave her a wide-eyed stare. “Why else?”

Her shrewd dark eyes stayed on his. “You’re not as innocent as you pretend. I think you have ulterior motives, a hidden agenda.”

He splayed a hand over his heart. “You wound me.” But his eyes danced mischievously.

Shaking her head, she rose. “You’re too much, Jeff Kirby.”

He was up and beside her in the next heartbeat. “Would you believe the truth,” he whispered, “that four or five days without you around was more than I could handle?”

Stepping back, she again shook her head. “No, I wouldn’t.”

“You’re a hard sell, Tish Buckner,” he commented.

“You have no idea how hard,” she answered, then turned to walk toward Belladonna.

Untying Domino, Jeff smiled to himself. And she had no idea how persistent he could be.



By the time they got to the winter grazing pasture where the cowboys had made camp, the sun was low in the sky. Pete and Derek had already found and rescued a calf stuck in a narrow canyon but Jim wasn’t back yet from scouring the area. The new arrivals took care of their horses first before asking the seasoned hands what they could do to help.

“We’ll split up tomorrow morning,” Pete said, taking charge as the most experienced, “two by two, each taking a section and roping any lost calves or cows, bringing them back to the herd. Justin’s down the canyon aways, heading here. If someone would like to get dinner going, I’m sure Justin would appreciate something other than jerky and beans.”

Derek studied the sky. “I don’t think we have to pitch tents tonight. Doesn’t look like we’ll have rain anytime soon.” He angled his chin toward a grassy shaded area. “You can set your bedrolls over there.”

They all worked well together, and in no time, they had wood gathered and a fire going. Jeff positioned the big black pot over the simmering blaze as the two women spooned in precooked stew that Elsa had packed for them. Tanya dug out tin plates and utensils while Tish cut thick slices of fresh brown bread that was one of Elsa’s specialties.

If Tish noticed that Jeff spread his bedroll next to hers, she didn’t let on. Soon Jim returned from his search-and-rescue effort empty-handed and Justin arrived from doing a perimeter check, glad for the company. And pleased to meet Jeff who’d just informed him that his wife was doing well.

“Thanks,” he said, his perpetually sunburned face creasing in a smile. His fair skin and blond head didn’t fare well with constant exposure to the sun, even wearing a wide-brimmed hat.

“Did your wife have an ultrasound?” Jeff asked as they all sat down around the campfire. “Do you know if you’re having a boy or a girl?”

“Nah, she didn’t want to. Me, I’d like to know, but Marianne said it’s more fun if you’re surprised.” Justin tossed his cigarette butt into the fire. “Really though, I don’t care as long as the baby’s healthy and Marianne’s okay.”

“Medicine’s come a long way,” Jeff pointed out. “Problems in childbirth are less common these days.”

“Good, because I’d like to have lots more. Maybe four more. Five sons, my own basketball team.” He grinned. “I haven’t mentioned this to Marianne yet.”

“You might want to hold off on that,” Tanya told him, “at least until she’s recovered from this first one.”

“Ah, but what if you have five girls?” Tish teased him. “Five prom dresses, five weddings to put on.”

“Oh, save me,” Justin said, laughing. He saw the stew was hot enough and was the first to ladle a healthy portion onto his plate. “Man, you guys don’t know how great this smells. Three weeks up here alone with cows, eating dried fruit, beans and jerky, and you begin to fantasize. Not about women, about a big steak with all the trimmings.”

“He’s been up here too long,” Jim commented and everyone laughed.

Listening to the ebb and flow of conversation, Jeff sat on the edge of the circle. He wasn’t one of the cowhands and as someone still fairly inactive in SPEAR even though he was a part of the team, he felt like he didn’t quite belong to either group. It had often been like that for him; growing up in a household where drunken behavior was the norm, he hadn’t felt as if he belonged to a real family unit. All he’d dreamed about was escaping. Which he had as soon as he’d been old enough.

Living on the streets, he never felt safe, either, never confided in others, never made friends because getting close to someone was inviting trouble. Runaways could turn on you for a slice of bread when they were starving, or a dollar when they needed cheap wine or a fix. He’d never been part of a real family, or a group of like individuals until East had taken him home. Even after that, it had taken Jeff months, years to trust, to relax, to feel safe with anyone except East.

Now, here with his fellow agents and experienced men who worked the herd at Red Rock, he felt a kinship, but still he didn’t feel as if he were a part of either specialized group. Listening to the way the men joked with one another with Tanya joining in, Jeff wondered if he would ever belong.

Finishing his plate, he glanced at Tish and saw that she, too, seemed on the perimeter of the group, observing and listening but seldom joining in. He wondered if their apartness was something they had in common, or if he was reading something into her behavior that wasn’t there. Maybe she was just shy or perhaps self-conscious because he was there and last night they’d shared a couple of powerful kisses. For him, a life-altering happening. But for her, had it been just one of those things?

He needed to find out, which was one reason he’d followed her up into the red rock high country.

Everyone helped to tidy up, no chauvinism here. After all, the women helped with the cattle so it was only fitting that the men help with food preparation and clean up. There was no pampering on ranches or with ranch chores.

After dinner, Justin talked Pete and John into a card game. Jim joined them while Tanya walked downstream to bathe, though she stayed within sight of the campfire. Tish sat near the fire, gazing off into space, seemingly lost in thought. Jeff was feeling pensive and perhaps a little embarrassed about racing up the mountain after a woman. Especially since that woman had probably left in the first place because she needed some space, some time to think about this sudden overpowering attraction.

So he lit one of the small cigars he rarely smoked and wandered upstream in the opposite direction from where Tanya went. If Tish needed to be alone, he’d let her be.

There was a moon out, not quite full but lending a good deal of light that reflected on the shimmering water as he walked. The small stream gurgled and dribbled over rocks small and large, the sound pleasant and appealing. Thinking of his hospital work in California and even East’s place on Condor Mountain, this red rock country was like being in another world. One that was peaceful, where the needs of animals superseded those of man. Mindful of the possibility of wild animals in the area, he knew it was also a dangerous place, but he didn’t feel threatened. In fact, he felt safe.

Maybe feeling safe had more to do with the people a person was with rather than the environment, Jeff decided.

He drew on the slim cigar, enjoying the pungent taste in his mouth. Reaching a fairly smooth rock, he sat down facing the stream and gazed up at the stars. He supposed there were just as many stars in the night sky over a busy metropolitan city as there were out here, yet there seemed more in the wilderness. An illusion probably.

He’d always thought that once he finished working for SPEAR, he’d like to settle near the sea. Yet this mountainous region held almost as much appeal. Perhaps he could find a place that offered both. Provided he lived to see that day.

Jeff wasn’t a melodramatic man or a pessimist. He was just a realist. Someone aware of the danger yet knowing that a man had to do what he had to do in order to look at himself each morning in his shaving mirror and not be disgusted with what he saw.

“A dollar for your thoughts,” a soft voice behind him said. When Jeff turned, he saw Tish and smiled. “I figure a penny, with inflation, should be at least a dollar by now.”

He moved over, making room for her on the rock. “My thoughts are kind of scattered tonight. How about yours?”

She sat down, her hip grazing his out of necessity since the space was limited. “I’m just taking in the beauty of nature out here. When you spend most of your life in an urban setting, you don’t realize how peaceful, how quiet and lovely a desolate area like this can be.”

The mooing of a cow broke into their thoughts just then as the scent of the big animals drifted upstream. “I’ve never seen so many cattle at one time in my entire life,” Tish commented. She’d walked out among them for a while after they’d first arrived. “Some of them have such sweet faces. I’ll never look at a hamburger the same again.”

He smiled at her. “I hear they make lousy house pets.”

“Oh, silly, I didn’t mean that. But they have such sad eyes.”

“I don’t suppose you’ve ever visited the Chicago slaughter houses.”

“No! And I don’t ever want to.”

“Still, you’re not a vegetarian?” He’d seen her eat her fair share of the beef stew tonight.

“No, I’m a head-in-the-sand carnivore who doesn’t want to think about those poor animals losing their lives so we can enjoy a meal.”

Jeff shrugged. “Survival of the fittest.” He glanced up toward an outcropping of rocks. “Take the mountain lion. He harbors no such thoughts. He’d pounce down on us, we’d be dinner for him and he wouldn’t give his conscience a second thought.”

Nervously, she glanced over her shoulder. “There really are mountain lions up here?”

“Could be. This is their territory and man is invading it. I suppose that’s why he feels its his right to devour us if the opportunity presents itself.” Jeff dropped his cigar and ground it out with his booted foot.

Tish got up. “Maybe we should go back with the others closer to the fire.”

He took her hand, pulled her effortlessly onto his lap, which had been his motive in bringing up the mountain lion in the first place. “Don’t worry. You’re safe with me.”

In the pale moonlight, she studied his face. “Safe is a relative term.”

“Yes, well, I won’t devour you, but I might nibble a little around the edges.” And he bent to do just that along the silken line of her throat. He felt a shiver take her and wondered if it was from the chilly night air or his ministrations. “Mmm, you taste almost as good as you smell.”

She was silent, but she shifted slightly to give him better access.

Emboldened by the fact that she’d sought him out while the others were occupied, he nuzzled more, then with two fingers on her chin, he turned her face toward his and captured her mouth. The kiss was light, gentle, yet arousing. Her lips played with his, teasing, tempting. Her tongue darted into his mouth, then withdrew playfully. Jeff wasn’t certain how much more of this he could easily handle with her snug on his lap.

Needing to distract himself, he eased back and ran his fingers through her hair as it curled around her ear. “You have beautiful hair, did you know that?”

Tish frowned. “No. It’s just brown hair. Nothing special.”

“That’s where you’re wrong. I’d always thought people with brown hair got short shrift, too. Blondes are described in all manner of flattering terms, fussed over and envied. Those with black hair are described as ebony or jet or raven. But brown hair, I thought, was just, well, brown.”





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