Книга - Nine Months’ Notice

Nine Months' Notice
Michele Dunaway


She'd Ended Their Perfect Affair…Jeff Wright never saw it coming. One minute he was in the midst of a white-hot office fling and the next the lady was over him and leaving for Kansas City. He had no idea what went wrong….For A More Permanent Arrangement!Tori Adams wanted it all. Two years with Jeff had been long on passion but short on commitment, which is why she'd planned on a new start. But she hadn't intended to get pregnant, and that was about to complicate her life in ways she hadn't foreseen. Because the man who'd been a good boss and amazingly passionate lover would pull out all the stops over the next nine months to show what a doting dad and devoted husband he could be!Sorority sisters, friends for life









Her friends would understand. They’d vowed on graduation day to have it all—love, marriage and children.


And Tori, well, she had Jeff. He didn’t love her. She was going to have his baby and he didn’t know. The situation was all messed up.

“You’ll be late,” she told him, impatient to get him out of the office. “And I have phone calls to make.”

“Oh. Okay.” He moved toward the door, as if reluctant to believe that she would really send him away. After all, how many times had she caved over the years?

“Call me if you change your mind about us.” And with that he was gone, the door clicking shut behind him.

Tori put her head in her hands. She’d made it.

She’d seen him…and survived.


Dear Reader,

Two of my best friends are single mothers. One was in her twenties, engaged at the time she got the news. My other friend was in her early thirties, and she found out she was expecting after she’d already broken off the relationship. Both knew the road ahead would be difficult, and they have done a phenomenal job raising their respective boys.

You may remember Tori, Jeff’s girlfriend from Unwrapping Mr. Wright. Tori’s just received nine months’ notice that her life is about to change in a major way. Not only is she starting a new career in a new city, but she’s also going to be a single mother. She’s ready to do this alone, but Jeff has other, better ideas. Long ago Tori vowed to have it all upon graduation (career, husband and family), and Jeff’s determined to make her dreams come true, even if not quite in the order she’d planned.

I hope you enjoy Nine Months’ Notice, the final book in my AMERICAN BEAUTIES miniseries. I had a great time writing Tori’s story. (Lisa’s was The Marriage Campaign; Cecile’s The Wedding Secret.) This book marks my fourteenth for Harlequin Books and I can’t state enough times how grateful I am that you, the reader, have been with me all the way.

As always, enjoy the romance and feel free to drop me an e-mail at michele@micheledunaway.com. Happy reading,







Nine Months’ Notice

Michele Dunaway






www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)




ABOUT THE AUTHOR


In first grade Michele Dunaway wanted to be a teacher when she grew up, and by second grade she wanted to be an author. By third grade she was determined to be both, and before her high school class reunion, she’d succeeded. In addition to writing romance, Michele is a nationally recognized high school English and journalism educator. Born and raised in a west county suburb of St. Louis, Michele has traveled extensively, with the cities and places she’s visited often becoming settings for her stories. Described as a woman who does too much but doesn’t know how to stop, Michele gardens five acres in her spare time and shares her life with two young daughters, six lazy house cats, one dwarf rabbit and two tankfuls of fish.

Michele loves to hear from readers. You can reach her via her Web site, www.micheledunaway.com (http://www.micheledunaway.com).




Books by Michele Dunaway


HARLEQUIN AMERICAN ROMANCE

988—THE PLAYBOY’S PROTÉGÉE

1008—ABOUT LAST NIGHT…

1044—UNWRAPPING MR. WRIGHT

1056—EMERGENCY ENGAGEMENT

1100—LEGALLY TENDER

1127—THE MARRIAGE CAMPAIGN * (#litres_trial_promo)

1144—THE WEDDING SECRET * (#litres_trial_promo)


For Lisa & Jenni. You go, girls.




Contents


Prologue (#u9a731286-bf58-5413-9215-14995dd93a28)

Chapter One (#u9d0bb85e-e279-54de-b66b-337575f2d41b)

Chapter Two (#ufcc13328-5c44-555b-b929-44444015c984)

Chapter Three (#u3e18bf5e-40ce-5ada-8763-6826556addd0)

Chapter Four (#u5a40f85c-229e-52de-ba30-73a15efc4c1d)

Chapter Five (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Six (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Seven (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Eight (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Nine (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Ten (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Eleven (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Twelve (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Thirteen (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Fourteen (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Fifteen (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Sixteen (#litres_trial_promo)




Prologue


Tori Adams was nobody’s fool, except maybe when it came to Jeff Wright. She might have an excuse once a year for letting her boss be her pied piper, but that didn’t excuse the other 364 days. Eight years ago, when she’d started her new job at Wright Solutions, you could rationalize her infatuation by calling her young. Just out of college. Naive.

They’d worked together for six years before she’d given in to her desires and mixed business with pleasure. The relationship had a rocky start, but, like baked Alaska after the fast flare, everything had calmed down.

They’d settled into a monotonous, dead-end rut.

Not that each time they were together wasn’t delicious. Take last night. All he’d had to do was touch her, something as simple as running a fingertip along the top of her arm, and she was molten and ready. Bottle his magnetism and she could make a fortune and retire twenty-two years early.

Of course, love was like that. Unfortunately, their love was strictly one-sided. Hers. Jeff had made it perfectly clear time and time again that this was as far as the relationship was going to go.

But that didn’t alleviate the fact that she’d fallen hard and held every man she’d met since against the impossible Jeff-standard. Even if George Clooney and Matthew McConaughey showed up on her doorstep, they, too, would fall woefully short.

As for Jeff, he was a man content with the status quo, oblivious to her growing frustration. He was satisfied with their current situation, which was to get together every Saturday night, so long as neither was traveling. They were monogamous. Committed.

In a very twisted sense, Tori thought wryly, for unlike those hot and spicy romance novels that ended with the hero and heroine finding happily-ever-after, Tori knew that, in her case, the reality was that her relationship wasn’t going anywhere. Ever.

She loved him, which is why she saw him at every opportunity, no matter how much her heart shredded slightly each time she did. He did care for her—she had no doubt of that—but his feelings would never reach that death-do-us-part, you’re-my-forever level that she craved. Their love was physical. Surface. And after two years, Tori wasn’t even sure Jeff had deep emotions beyond the ones everyone has for his immediate family. The man simply didn’t get angry. He played life loose and took things as they came. He shed stress the way a roof sheds water—easily.

She’d learned the hard way that you should never go into a relationship expecting to change a man. You were only going to leave disappointed.

She’d settled for less than body and soul, something she swore long ago she’d never do. Why had she given up hope of finding something or someone better? When had the tiny part of her that believed she could have it all died? She loved Jeff, but not everything you loved was good for you. Just look at cheesecake. She’d eat that daily if it wouldn’t pack pounds on her hips. She’d never been afraid of the unknown, but something about Jeff had paralyzed her into complacency and made her lose sight of her dreams.

She’d lost her backbone. She’d even agreed to spend the weekend with him when she knew she should have stayed home and concentrated on getting well. She’d been on antibiotics the past seven days for a spring sinus infection. She had three more days of medication remaining, and still went from being totally stuffed up one moment to nonstop sneezing the next.

But she hadn’t seen him in a week and she missed him and…She glanced at the clock before she slid out of bed. Eight-fifteen. Her nose twitched as she stilled a sneeze, and she took a moment to stare at the rumpled bed where Jeff lay sleeping on his stomach, the sheet slipped to his waist. He was a gorgeous man—even more handsome than his twin, Justin. Jeff had light-green eyes, unlike his brother, whose were more emerald. Jeff’s chin rounded more than Justin’s squared one, and Jeff’s Roman nose had been broken during a long-ago hockey game, giving a roguish quality to his face. His hair was the perfect shade—not too red or too orangey-blond. Not one freckle from childhood marred his skin.

Even asleep he tempted her. Maybe she should just climb back into bed and…

She shook her head, snapped herself out of it, and gathered up her stuff. She headed into the en suite bathroom of Jeff’s condo. She’d leave in a few minutes while he was still sleeping, as she did most of the time. Sundays were Jeff’s sleep-in days and Tori, who was always up by eight no matter what the day, actually preferred to have the afternoon to herself so she could get ready for the week ahead.

She freshened up and crammed the last of her personal items into the small white bag she carried between his place and hers. As she did, her fingers settled on the little plastic case that contained her birth control. Frowning, she popped it open. She hadn’t taken last night’s dose. Twelve hours shouldn’t make a difference; she’d forgotten before.

She pushed a pill out and popped it into her mouth, swallowed and sneezed. High time to go. Within minutes, Tori was inside her car where the letdown came immediately. She couldn’t keep doing this indefinitely. She wanted more. She’d made a vow with her friends at graduation to have it all and if she stayed in St. Louis in this situation with Jeff, her life would be over before it started. In the harsh late-April sunlight, Tori finally admitted that she’d reached her limit. Something had to change.




Chapter One


There were two pink lines on the plastic stick. Tori stared at the pregnancy test she was holding in her right hand as if willing it to change. Even though she had a master’s degree in computer science, she held the test up to the back of the box to make sure she’d read the results correctly.

Two lines. Pregnant.

The box gleefully proclaimed that it was 99.9 percent accurate, but Tori read the wording again. The odds she was pregnant were pretty good; this was the second test she’d taken—the first one she’d wrapped in layers of toilet paper and stuffed back inside the box about five minutes ago.

That test had also been positive, which meant she wasn’t just missing her period because of stress as she had done a few times before in her life. As she’d thought had happened at the end of May. No, two months of missed cycles and two positive tests meant one thing.

She was having Jeff Wright’s baby.

Tori wrapped the second stick in toilet paper and shoved it into the box before placing the whole package back into the plain brown bag the drugstore had thoughtfully provided. She tossed the sack in the trash can, making sure to hide it at the bottom.

She hadn’t planned on taking the test, especially not at work. She’d run by the drugstore at lunch to get some headache medicine and, worried about having missed her period twice in a row, had picked up the test after she’d passed it in the aisle. Then the box had sat in her purse like a homing beacon. Finally, at about four o’clock, she hadn’t been able to take the suspense any more. She had to know the results.

And now she did.

She straightened and took a long, hard look at herself in the mirror. She was about to be a mother. While a woman had reproductive choices today, Tori had known the moment she’d bought the test what her decision would be if the results were positive.

She gazed into her own brown eyes. While this wasn’t quite how she’d planned it, she knew she would be a wonderful single mom. She was turning thirty December first; she had a good job with excellent benefits; and, as a fantastic “aunt” to her friend Joann’s kids, Tori knew she could handle diapers and feedings. Besides, her whole family lived near Kansas City, where she had recently moved, giving her a great support system to draw on. And she knew that her best friends from college, the Roses, would agree with her and support her decision.

Still, the irony mocked. While she’d been trying to change her life by moving to Kansas City and breaking up with Jeff at the end of May, she certainly hadn’t intended this.

Tori blinked and shook her head. She’d recently shed her long, dark hair, chopping off six inches so that the locks now bobbed just below her chin. She wasn’t quite used to not having the weight and the strands tickled her chin.

She sighed. Taking the test was probably going to be the easiest part. Despite all her book smarts, she had little idea how to proceed. Did one just call up and announce, Guess what? I’m pregnant? Was there a chain-of-command of people you were supposed to tell first, such as your own parents or the father? Did it even matter?

Even the decision to accept the promotion and transfer to Kansas City had been easier to make than facing the situation now looming on the horizon.

She thought about her new job a moment. Her career had always been a top priority in her life, and relocating had let her leave Jeff behind. She hadn’t seen him since leaving St. Louis, and time had been a healing balm, giving her much-needed space and perspective. Oh, she still loved him—part of her always would—but she wasn’t moping anymore. She’d put the past behind her and was ready to start a new life. She’d joined some of the women in the office in their Internet dating adventures. While she hadn’t found anyone, at least she was back on the market.

Although not for long. She was going to have a baby.

How would Jeff take the news? Would he be excited? Or would he feel inconvenienced, trapped? She’d been on the Pill and they’d never discussed the possibility of kids.

Tori swallowed the hurt that often rose when she thought of both Jeff and her past failure in not accepting the hopelessness of her situation earlier. Deep down she knew that his first love was his job; he focused on work and the endless travel that came with it. He and his brothers, Jared and Justin, had founded Wright Solutions, a technology company that did everything from designing and installing high-end networks to selling software to hardware recycling and disposal. Jeff and his brothers had made Wright Solutions a one-stop shop for business computing needs.

Of the three brothers, Jeff was the problem solver, which was the trait that had first attracted Tori. He stopped hackers, recovered data, and strengthened firewalls. He was focused—like her.

When she’d first been hired, she’d worked in his division. Their paths had diverged when she’d been promoted, and now everything Wright Solutions touched west of Kansas City was handled through her office. The management position was a crowning achievement. Her salary and stock options let her live comfortably.

When she’d broken things off, she’d been determined not to let her personal life interfere with her career. She had no intention of changing companies and jeopardizing her future advancement. She and Jeff had been friends first; surely they could be friends post-breakup.

Now a wrench had been tossed into the machinery. She put her hand on her still-flat stomach. He’d make beautiful babies. He had the right to know. She winced. She had no desire to tell him. She would, of course, but only after she saw the doctor and made sure the tests were correct.

Tori backed away from the sink. Oftentimes, she’d wondered if she’d made life too easy for Jeff—maybe that’s why things had never progressed. Unlike most couples, they talked only in person, keeping in touch via short e-mails, Jeff’s preferred means of communication. He wasn’t a phone conversationalist and all their calls lasted less than five minutes, unless they were fighting.

Not that they fought often since, really, there wasn’t much to argue about. From the beginning, Jeff had been clear on how their relationship was going to be—monogamous, hot, passionate, no strings, easily ended whenever the other felt like it.

Never once had they discussed children, much less marriage. She’d told Jeff how she felt about him once, but he hadn’t replied in kind. He’d told her he liked things how they were. Instead of walking away as she should have done—and isn’t hindsight twenty-twenty?—Tori hadn’t pressed, accepting that something was better than nothing. She should have left him long before she had.

Now the writing was on the wall or, more aptly, the lines were on the stick. Tori Adams, who had graduated summa cum laude and who could solve complicated math problems in her head, had blown it. Just as she had been poised to start over, to find someone to spend her life with, the traditional life she wanted—find the guy, get married, have children—she was about to get exactly the opposite. She’d always be tied irrevocably to Jeff. They’d always share a child.

A knock sounded on her outside office door and Tori opened her bathroom door and called out, “Hold on.”

She made sure the remnants of her tests weren’t lying around, washed her hands and closed the door behind her. She gave her office one last glance to make sure nothing was amiss, then double-checked her Friday casual outfit for lint before she greeted her visitor.

Jeff Wright stood in front of her, a wide grin on his face. “Surprise.”

“JEFF,” TORI SAID, her equilibrium rattled. She suddenly felt like the neurotic, guilty man in Edgar Allan Poe’s “The Tell-Tale Heart.” She took a deep breath to calm her nerves; there was no way Jeff could know her secret and she refused to blurt out her news here. “Jeff, what are you doing here? Did we have an appointment?”

Jeff frowned, the grin slipping from his face. “No, we didn’t have an appointment. I didn’t know I needed one. In fact, I’m not really visiting, I just have a fast layover before flying back to St. Louis.”

He closed her office door behind him, the click audible. “I figured I’d pop by, check out the KC office. See how you were doing. We haven’t talked in a while.”

Tori stared at him. “Well, I haven’t seen you since I transferred and I report to Justin now,” Tori said, trying to get a sense of why he was here unexpectedly. This was out of character for him.

Jeff shifted his weight from one foot to the other as if the situation wasn’t going quite the way he’d envisioned. “Everything okay with the job? Still like it?”

Tori nodded, her hair dancing around her chin. “It’s been great. We’ve landed five new accounts and exceeded all of last quarter’s income projections.”

Jeff stuffed his hands into his pockets for a moment. Tori had never really liked wearing heels, and in her flats he was seven inches taller than she was. “I guess I should have asked if everything is okay with you?” he clarified.

“Why wouldn’t it be?” Tori asked, forcing herself to relax. She’d tell him about the baby after visiting the doctor, when she would know things such as her due date. Now was not the time.

“No reason.” Jeff raked a hand through his strawberry-colored hair, a habit whenever he was nervous. “I guess I just miss talking to you. Maybe things aren’t okay with me.”

He missed her. She could see it reflected in his eyes. Maybe they had a chance. Maybe…

“I’ve really missed you,” he repeated. “I want you back in my life. It’s been weeks.”

While her body hummed with the longing it always felt around Jeff Wright, his subsequent statement had made her want to fall through the floor with disappointment. He didn’t love her. He was just sexually frustrated. They’d never had problems in that department.

She was determined that this time she wouldn’t succumb to his charms or his “needs.” She was going to be a mother. Time to grow up and stop living in fantasyland. He wasn’t going to change.

“I can’t see you anymore,” Tori managed, proud of herself for keeping her chin up and somehow looking him in the eye. They’d fit each other once, but no longer. He was a man married to his computer and his cat. She wanted more than an addiction she slaked every week. She wanted it all, like the love her mother had found with her second husband, Tori’s stepfather. “I’m sorry, but no. It’s high time for both of us to move on. Although I would like for us to be friends.”

Jeff stood there, his pale-green broadcloth shirt making him look sexier than any model. The imaginary devil on her shoulder screamed in her ear that she was being an idiot. But deep down she knew this was the right thing to do. She wasn’t aware she was holding her breath until she exhaled at the exact moment he slowly said, “I see.”

An awkward silence descended. Tori’s body still hummed; the man was as irresistible as chocolate cake—but she was winning the battle against indulging. “I know this sounds harsh, but we always said we’d let each other know when we were ready to move on. I’m happy here. New town, new life.”

“New man,” Jeff said, his tone edgy.

“Eventually,” Tori confirmed, knowing that finding a man was now the lowest item on her priority list. Her baby came first. “We’re at opposite ends of the state. We’ve always been friends—we can put things back the way they once were. That would be best.”

“Yeah, I guess we can be friends,” he said, his watch beeping as the alarm went off. He silenced it.

“Work?” Tori said.

“Always. I need to get back to the airport,” Jeff said. “I’m flying to St. Louis and then tomorrow I’m headed to Buffalo for a week-long project. After that I’m home for a little while before I’m back out in L.A.”

“You do travel a lot,” Tori observed. She knew that he’d racked up over half a million frequent-flier miles the year before.

Jeff grinned, but this time his smile didn’t quite reach his eyes. “Yeah, well, you know how I like to be constantly on the go. I like the adventure. No grass grows under my feet.”

She did, which was why she held her tongue and simply gave him the patient smile of one ready to get back to work. He recognized the message and stepped toward the door. “I guess I’d better get going. Airport security’s tight right now and I don’t want to miss my flight.”

“Probably a good idea,” Tori said, doing her best to hold herself together for a few more minutes. She could let him go, let him walk out without breaking down. Seeing him was hard, but she had to remember that he hadn’t changed. This visit confirmed the futility of her current situation. She was having his baby, and part of her would always love him, but he’d never love her. And to top it off, he was always working and jetting off somewhere. The job would always be number one, not her or the baby.

Jeff paused. “Should I tell Lauren you said hi?”

Tori nodded. “Please.”

Lauren was Justin’s wife and she was currently on maternity leave. Over three years ago, she and Tori had been on the company Christmas-party committee together and they had been friends since. That night had been a catalyst for both women’s relationships with the Wright twins.

Tori suddenly realized she’d have to take a six-week maternity leave at the very least. She made a mental note to check her company benefits brochure. A bit overwhelmed by all the changes she was facing, Tori moved to sink into the sofa located in her office.

“You appear a little pale,” Jeff said. “Can I get you something to drink before I go?”

“I’m fine,” Tori said, waving him off. “Go catch your flight. I’ll get something later.”

He didn’t seem to believe her. “You’re sure?”

“Yes.” What she needed was for him to leave.

“Let me get you some water anyway,” Jeff said. He strode to the small bar fridge in the corner. “Have you been eating?”

“Yes. Plenty,” Tori said, watching him. He’d always been kind to her, remembering things such as her favorite foods. She focused. That didn’t mean he loved her.

“So, do you still talk to your friends in St. Louis?” Jeff asked as he gave Tori a bottle of water.

“Yes. Lisa’s getting married. She called to tell me last week. I’m still in shock.”

“Lisa’s one of your sorority sisters,” Jeff said. He dallied for a moment.

“Right. Rho Sigma Gamma.”

As she spoke the words, Tori felt a slight twang of depression. She, Lisa Meyer, Joann Smith and Cecile Deletsky had pledged together and become fast friends. Joann was a stay-at-home mom of three. Lisa was a political fund-raiser working on getting her candidate into the Missouri governor’s mansion. Cecile had relocated to Chicago and was a producer for a popular talk show. They’d been extremely supportive of Tori’s decision to leave Jeff. She wondered what they’d think when she told them her news.

At least that would be easier than telling her own mother. Her mother was going to be, in a word, disappointed.

Her friends would understand. They’d all vowed on graduation day to have it all—love, marriage and children. So what if Tori wasn’t doing things in order? Of course, while Joann had been pregnant when she got married, she’d at least had a man who loved her.

Tori, well, she had Jeff. He was now standing beside her, a reminder that for her, dreams didn’t come true. He didn’t love her. He wanted her for sex. She was going to have his baby. The situation was all messed up.

“You’ll be late,” she told him, impatient to get him out of the office. “And I have phone calls to make.”

“Oh. Okay.” He again moved toward the door as if finally believing she meant to send him away. Or maybe it was because he had a plane to catch. How many times had she caved over the years? He popped a piece of gum into his mouth. “I can’t miss my flight. I’ll see you later. Call me if you change your mind about us.”

And with that he was gone, the door clicking shut behind him. Tori trembled and placed her head in her hands. She’d made it. She’d seen him and survived.




Chapter Two


“What are you still doing here? Don’t you have a date?”

Jeff glanced up from where he’d been staring at the flat-screen computer monitor, a confused expression on his face as he looked at his twin brother. “Date?” he echoed. He hadn’t had a date since Tori dumped him. Not that he couldn’t have had someone else in a snap, he consoled himself. There was that girl on the flight to St. Louis. But he’d walked off the plane without her phone number. Work was a priority and, frankly, Tori’s defection and her subsequent rejection had rattled Jeff a little more than he realized. Even now it bothered him.

As for dates, his calendar was clear until tomorrow when he had to fly across the state to St. Joseph for a business meeting. He didn’t have anything on the agenda except to go home and play the latest video game of which he had an advance copy.

Justin rolled his eyes and exhaled a sharp breath. “You are useless, you know that? You have a date with Hailey. Remember your niece?”

“Oh—” Jeff bit off the expletive and jumped to his feet. He pressed a button, closing all programs and sending the computer to sleep. “Sorry. I got so busy fine-tuning tomorrow’s presentation that I forgot all about babysitting.”

“Yes, my wife kind of figured that, so here I am.”

Justin crossed his arms and Jeff cringed at his oversight. “Time just slipped away from me.”

Justin nodded. “It always does, which is why Lauren was wise enough to call and ask if you were buried up to your eyeballs in work. She also said if you get over there pronto maybe she’ll forgive you.”

Jeff grinned. Lauren knew him far too well. They’d been next-door neighbors in the same condominium complex until she’d married Justin. Now, Jeff was an uncle and he relished the role. But as always, he’d got caught up in a project and had forgotten the real world. While his dedication was fantastic for the company, it played hell on earth with his personal life. He was always late—or at least 96.5 percent of the time. Drove most people nuts. Tori had been the exception.

Jeff sobered at that thought. He really needed to stop thinking about her. They’d promised each other that neither would dwell on the past. If she was moving on then he had to respect that. Even if she was one of the few people on the planet who truly understood him.

Jeff was a numbers person—a math savant if you wanted to go that far. He’d taken calculus in the eighth grade, college courses during high school. He loved to search for numerical patterns. Computers fascinated him. Give him a technological task and he was like a dog with a bone. The rest of the world seemed to disappear.

But he always eventually returned to reality. Like now. He stood and headed toward the door. Playing uncle, even with dirty diaper changes, was quite a good time, much more interesting than a lot of visits with other relatives he endured once a year. He’d discovered that Hailey already had him wrapped around her little finger. Ten months old. Who knew a woman’s power started so early?

“Call Lauren and tell her I’m on my way,” Jeff told Justin. He grabbed his briefcase. “You guys don’t live far, so she’ll still have plenty of time to run her errands.”

“Thanks,” Justin said. “Lauren really wants to get out of the house. She’s got some things to do and Mom can’t babysit today. Lauren doesn’t want to take Hailey out in this heat.”

Jeff nodded, understanding. Even though summer had barely started, St. Louis was already suffering a miserable streak of 100-degree days with little chance of rain. Even the grass had turned brown and everyone’s air conditioners were fighting to keep up. Without a good rain, the rest of the summer was going to be lousy.

Jeff arrived at his sister-in-law’s about ten minutes later. “Hey, Lauren. Sorry I’m late.” He gave her a quick kiss on the cheek as he stepped into the foyer of the one-story house. Jeff immediately reached for his niece. “How’s my little boo?”

Lauren rolled her eyes at Jeff’s pet name, but Hailey didn’t seem to mind. From the security of her mother’s arms she lunged forward and reached both hands out for her uncle. Jeff caught her. As soon as he had Hailey securely, Lauren stepped back and let go.

Jeff walked into the living room carrying Hailey. His niece smelled of baby powder and that fresh, sweet scent synonymous with little girls. Lauren had probably given her a bath.

Jeff glanced at Lauren. Her blond hair was pulled up in a ponytail and woven through the back of her white St. Louis Cardinals baseball cap. In shorts and a T-shirt, she looked every bit the suburban mom.

“So get shopping,” he told her. “I’ve got this down. Is the formula still in the same place?”

Jeff bounced Hailey slightly and his niece laughed. The television was on in the corner of the room, tuned to a children’s show on PBS. Jeff put his hand under Hailey’s back and said “Airplane!” Then he swooped her slightly, as if using her body to draw the bottom of a bowl. Hailey shrieked, and Jeff grinned as Lauren tried not to wince. “Giving Mom a heart attack, aren’t we?” Jeff teased. “Paying her back for probably doing it to her parents.”

“Yeah, well,” Lauren said. She watched for a moment before giving a resigned shake of her head. “The formula’s in the cabinet and I just washed the bottles. Call me if you have any problems.”

Lauren reached for her purse and Jeff followed her into the kitchen. Because she’d walk through the utility room into the garage, he’d parked on the street so she’d be able to back out easier.

“Go. I’m fine here,” Jeff commanded.

Lauren was always hesitant about leaving Hailey, especially now that her daughter had just started walking. Hailey was one of those babies doing everything early, just as her daddy and her uncle had.

“You know I’ve got her,” Jeff insisted.

“I know you do,” Lauren said. She looped her purse strap over her arm. Content with Jeff, Hailey didn’t cry even as her mom headed out the door. Lauren paused a moment. “You know, you’d make a good dad. You should think about having one of your own. Give Hailey here a cousin or two to play with as she gets older.”

Jeff’s cheeks heated and he knew his face probably matched his hair. “Well, I…Jared’s taken care of that,” he said. His older brother did have two children already.

“Good save,” Lauren said. “By the way, what’s going on with you and Tori? You dated her longer than anyone else.”

“Yeah, well, things change,” Jeff said. “This here is the only girl who has my attention right now. I guess Kansas City is too far away to make anything work.” Hailey laughed as Jeff gave her a raspberry on her belly.

Lauren frowned, the small crease between her brows indicating she wasn’t done with the topic. “So what if she’s in KC? Last I checked that wasn’t very far away, a four-hour drive tops in that speedy new Corvette you just bought. And I know you have plenty of frequent-flier miles you could use. I mean, if you want something to work, distance shouldn’t be a factor. Perhaps you should go after her. Women like that. Justin chased me and see how happy we are?”

“Don’t you have somewhere to be?” Jeff prodded, not really wanting to discuss Tori. He wrinkled his nose and his expression soured. “You know, Lauren, you’re welcome to stay and linger if you’d like to change your lovely daughter before you leave.”

Lauren shook her head and laughed. “No, no, I’m going. That diaper can be your penance for being late.” She opened the door to the garage. “Remember, call me on my cell if there’s a problem.”

“Will do,” Jeff promised. He held Hailey easily as he took her back to her bedroom and placed her on the changing table. She gazed up at him, her green eyes wide. While she’d inherited her dad’s eyes, the pale downy hair coming in was definitely from her mother.

“You are a pretty thing,” Jeff told her. “You’d have to be for me to change you. I’m pretty discriminate about whose diapers I take off. You know, I never changed any of your cousins. Don’t tell them, okay? They might get jealous.”

Hailey simply blinked at him. She was still a little too young to say actual words—those would come in another month or two, followed by incessant conversation at eighteen months.

Jeff folded up the diaper and tossed it into the trash. “I won’t bore you with the statistics on how that diaper will take more than five-hundred years to degrade,” he said. Hailey continued to wait as Jeff wiped her bottom, added some baby powder, then securely fastened her new diaper. Within seconds, she was back in his arms, her cute pink dress draped over his arm.

“So what do you think? Did I do an okay change?” As he walked back into the living room, Jeff thought about what Lauren had said. He liked the idea that he’d make a good father. He loved Hailey and even though Jeff and Justin were twins, Hailey could tell them apart. Stand Jeff and Justin next to each other and she wanted her dad every time.

Perhaps babies simply made you feel paternal. For a minute Jeff reflected on the fission of happiness that had shot through his system when Hailey had reached for him. Was the moment exponentially better and more powerful when it was your own child? Jeff had no idea, but holding Hailey felt right. Maybe he was getting to the place in his life where he was ready to settle down.

“Who knew guys had biological clocks?” Jeff mused aloud as he placed Hailey in her exerciser. While he might have doubted it a few years ago, he knew now that he wanted to be a father. Of course it took two people for that. Had he committed a cardinal sin somewhere along the line with Tori? They’d been so comfortable together and then all of a sudden, boom, she’d moved to Kansas City and broken up with him. He sighed. On the TV screen a blue puppet was singing about the letter H.

Hailey was happily playing and safe, so Jeff mulled over the conundrum. He’d known Tori for what amounted to forever. She’d outlasted any other woman in his life aside from his mother. He and Tori had been friends for years before they’d first gotten together after the company Christmas party. Their passion had been hot and fast, but the next day she’d told him it had been a mistake and had gone back to her ex-boyfriend for a few weeks. He’d chased her then, won her and then they’d developed a routine. He cared about her more than anyone else.

But was she the one? Jeff sat there a moment, distracting himself by watching Hailey spin around in her exerciser. How did somebody know he’d found his soul mate? Justin had screwed things up terribly with Lauren and almost lost her. Jared hadn’t had things easy, either. Sure his brothers were happy now, but neither had had a lightbulb “aha” moment at the start of their relationships. And love wasn’t like installing a software program. There were no signs that you were one-hundred percent complete.

As for compatibility, he and Tori thought the same. They were both math people who had taken extra math classes in school just for fun and to boost their GPAs. They were long beyond such trivialities as wooing and making an impression. She knew how much he cared about her and he the same. Actions spoke louder than words, which could often be meaningless, any day. Tori’s last boyfriend had told her he loved her and then cheated on her right and left. Jeff hadn’t wanted to make that same mistake, so he’d erred on the side of caution.

In his job, he was the one who traced problems back to their source. He found solutions, made sure the situation never crept up again and, if it did try to rear its ugly head, he made certain that it could be quickly eradicated. So had he missed something? Had he been too conservative? Had he taken Tori for granted? A squeal interrupted his reverie. Hailey had stopped spinning and was looking at him with a dazed but satisfied expression. She held out her arms.

Jeff rose and went to get her. “Up you go.” She snuggled next to him, ready for a bottle and a nap. He ran a hand over her downy hair, marveling at its blond softness as he carried her into the kitchen. He knew Tori well enough to know that she was through with him. Jeff had blown it with Tori big time. But his brothers had each found their perfect mates. Proof was right in his arms—a life created out of love. Maybe, if he was lucky, there was still hope for him.




Chapter Three


The day before her first doctor’s appointment, Tori was unable to shake the mixture of melancholy and excitement she was experiencing. On one hand, she was thrilled to be becoming a mom. On the other, she already felt overwhelmed—think of all the preparations she had to make. The phone rang and Tori picked up on the second ring.

“Hey, stranger,” Tori said, having recognized Cecile’s phone number on the caller ID display.

“Hey, yourself,” Cecile said. “I haven’t talked to you in ages. What’s up?”

“Everything,” Tori admitted. “I—”

“Ah, Jeff,” Cecile interrupted. “What’s going on with him? You haven’t gone back to him, have you?”

“No,” Tori said. She chewed on her bottom lip. “He did stop by the office once.”

“And?” Cecile prodded. A few seconds of silence later Cecile said, “Oh.”

“No, not that,” Tori replied. “I held my ground. I told him it was over.”

“That’s good,” Cecile said.

“Maybe,” Tori agreed after a moment. She opened her mouth to tell Cecile about her doctor’s appointment when Cecile said, “I met someone at my sister’s wedding reception.”

“Really?”

“Yeah,” Cecile said. “Hotter than the summer day. Blond. Tall. Body to die for and more magnetism than the north pole.”

“And what’s wrong with that?” Tori asked.

“I imbibed,” Cecile admitted. “I said I wasn’t going to and I did anyway. So much for turning over a new leaf.”

Tori winced. “Will you see him again?”

Cecile sighed. “I don’t know. He’s my brother-in-law’s best friend. I’m sure our paths will cross. I didn’t leave a number and I’m still debating if that was the right thing to do.”

“You got me,” Tori said. “That’s sort of what happened with me and Jeff. We got together one night and I regretted it afterward. Maybe I should have trusted my judgment.”

“Debatable,” Cecile said. “You cared for him. It was an easy mistake—you shouldn’t beat yourself up over it.”

“I guess. Things are a little weird right now, especially since I still work for him. This job’s so good, though, I wasn’t going to give it up for something less.”

“And you shouldn’t have to,” Cecile said. “Wright Solutions is a great company to work for.”

“Exactly. Still, it’s hard. I keep believing that if I don’t think about him it’ll get better. I mean, I’m not afraid of being alone.”

She wasn’t because she had plenty of friends and work to keep her busy. But moving on was still difficult, she was letting a part of her life go. Jeff had been her present and—she’d hoped—her future, and now he was her past. Sort of.

She’d always have a little piece of him now that she was having his baby. She wasn’t sure if that was good or bad, but it didn’t matter. It simply was.

“Cecile, what would you do if you found out your one-night stand left you with a baby? Would you tell him?” Tori asked, moving into her kitchen and grabbing a plastic cup.

“Why are you asking me this? Did you have a one-night stand you didn’t tell me about?”

“No,” Tori said, holding the cup under the ice dispenser. She wanted Cecile’s honest answer before she told her about the baby. “Hypothetical. I just wondered if you’d tell him.”

“In my opinion, children should grow up having two parents if that’s possible,” Cecile said. “But I guess it’s hard to say when it’s not happening to you.”

“I suppose there’s no easy choice,” Tori said, sipping her water. For some reason she felt slightly dehydrated.

“Why all this interest in this topic? You’re not pregnant, are you?”

Yes.

Tori opened her mouth to say the word but at that moment Cecile’s phone beeped, indicating she had another call. “Hey, that’s my mom. She and Dad are letting me take one of their old armchairs for my apartment. Do you mind if I answer them and get back to you later?”

“No, that’s fine. We’ll talk soon. Call me anytime.” Tori hung up and glanced around her apartment. She’d splurged, getting a one-bedroom loft unit with upgraded appliances. On the first floor she had a living room with a fireplace, a kitchen, a washer/dryer and a half bath. Upstairs she had a full bathroom and a bedroom that overlooked the living room. Her apartment, which had seemed so spacious when she’d first moved in, wasn’t going to be adequate once she had the baby.

She walked over to the refrigerator and pulled off the magnetic to-do notepad she’d hung there. She grabbed a stray pen she found on the breakfast bar and, standing, she wrote at the top: Go to doctor’s appointment. Underneath she wrote: Decide what to do about Jeff.

Disgruntled, she sighed, set the paper down and finished drinking her water. She debated about what Cecile had said. What type of a father would Jeff be? He was never in town. He hired a pet sitter to care for his cat. How could he be a dad if he was always traveling? The man had no focus unless it was technology related. Babies were about as basic as things came. They couldn’t talk, walk, feed themselves or communicate. They needed nonstop care. She worried that Jeff wouldn’t be able to handle the work involved, even if he did babysit Hailey now and then.

Long ago, when she’d first gotten into the relationship, she’d dreamed of what it might be like to be married to Jeff Wright. She’d quickly realized that it wouldn’t be the stuff of romance novels. While they were compatible in tons of ways, in reality she and Jeff had stayed together because they didn’t worry about things such as who was doing laundry, who was paying for what and who was doing his or her fair share. They’d neutralized the issues married couples dealt with. She’d wasted two years trying to make something work; she and Jeff didn’t have staying power—that deep commitment and determination to get through things beyond just pleasure and convenience.

Tori put her glass in the dishwasher. When she’d been eleven her parents had divorced. Her dad had moved to California. She’d seen him only on rare occasions and heard from him when he’d remembered her on major holidays. She wouldn’t allow her child to have that type of life.

People might argue that a child deserved two parents, but Tori thought a child deserved two parents who made the child a top priority. If that weren’t possible, then no parent was better than one who constantly made you wonder whether you were worth it or whether you were valued at all.

If Tori wondered about her place in Jeff’s life, what would her baby think growing up, asking where Daddy was and why Daddy “forgot”?

Tori tapped her fingers on the countertop, the background noise a comforting staccato. Her own mother hadn’t gotten remarried right away, waiting instead until the perfect man had come along when Tori was a sophomore in high school. Richard Kennedy was the perfect stepfather. Tori’s mother had never been happier. And Richard had always made Tori feel valued and welcome, even when she’d become a big sister. Although Tori was almost sixteen years older than her younger brother, Kenny, the two were close. The whole family was close. That was all to Richard’s credit.

Tori reached for her phone and pressed a speed-dial button. Within seconds, her mother picked up. “Hey Mom,” Tori said. “When’s the next family dinner?”

“You trolling for a free meal?” her mother, Kathleen, teased. “Tomorrow’s Friday and Kenny’s got a baseball tournament this weekend so we’ll be over in Raytown. Of course you’re welcome to join us if you’re not heading to St. Louis.”

“I might be,” Tori lied.

Her mom was used to Tori’s travels. “How about Monday, then? After work? Say six o’clock? We’re all off for Independence Day, so we can relax.”

Tori wrote the information on the sheet of paper she’d been using. “I’ll see you then. Love you.”

“Me, too. If you change your mind, call me. I know Kenny would love to see his big sister at some of his games.”

“I’ll see what I can do. Maybe next weekend. E-mail me the schedule and I’ll work something out.”

“I’ll do that. Talk to you soon. Love ya.”

“Me, too.” Tori ended the call and strolled into the living room. Her apartment backed up on to woods, and her living room windows overlooked nothing but old oak trees. When out on her balcony, she could pretend she lived in a tree house. She’d signed a year’s lease, but would have to find somewhere else to live when it expired. Something one-story with few steps that would need to be gated off. Maybe she’d buy a condo.

Why had she told her mother she was heading to St. Louis for the weekend? Tori had never considered herself a chicken, but, once she’d called her mom, she hadn’t found the nerve to tell her about the baby. At least the story gave her a bit more time to figure out how to tell them.

So maybe she was a bit of a chicken. She’d never been afraid of anything before, accepting any challenge put before her. In college a boyfriend had dared her to go bungee jumping, knowing Tori had a fear of heights. Refusing to back out, she did it and never showed how scared she really had been. Tori wasn’t afraid to get down and dirty when necessary.

At least, she used to be fearless. Her life was changing so fast that suddenly she felt timid. Unsettled. Not quite herself. She wasn’t invincible any longer. She couldn’t just jump in feet first and worry about the consequences later. Tori placed her hand on her stomach, something she’d been doing constantly, as if touching herself somehow made the fact she was going to be a mother real. She knew she couldn’t hide from what was happening. She’d see the doctor, make sure everything was okay and there were no complications and then tell Jeff. That would be the best, most prudent course of action. She’d then tell her family and friends. After all, there was still a point-one chance the test could be wrong.

“YOU’RE DEFINITELY PREGNANT,” Dr. Sarah Hillyer said as she moved the ultrasound wand over Tori’s stomach, pressing slightly. “If you look right there on the monitor, that’s your baby. While it’s not much yet, this is the outline of the head and this is the body.”

Tori’s breath caught in her throat. The black-and-white image wasn’t the sharpest, but she could make out what the doctor was showing her. There was life growing inside her.

“We’ll schedule you for another ultrasound before you leave today,” the doctor continued. “You’ll see a whole lot more then as it will be a more in-depth examination. This one just tells us that you aren’t going to be having multiples. You said the father was an identical twin and twins do run in families. From what I can tell, you’re just having one.”

“Wow,” Tori said simply, taking a final peek at the screen before the doctor removed the wand from her stomach.

“Quite incredible, isn’t it?” Dr. Hillyer said. “I see so many of these and I’m moved every time. Go ahead and get dressed, then meet me in my office.”

With that, she left the room and gave Tori her privacy.

Tori sat up and used the paper towels provided to wipe the gel off her stomach. Despite the positive pregnancy tests, Tori had still wondered if they hadn’t been wrong. The ultrasound, though, sealed it for her. She was going to be a mother. Although the image hadn’t looked like much, she was having a baby and it was depending on her for nourishment. She’d never been so happy or so humbled.

She dressed and went to the doctor’s personal office. Dr. Hillyer was already seated behind her huge mahogany desk. “Based on when you were taking the antibiotics for you infection and on the results of the ultrasound, I’m estimating your due date to be December 30. You just might have a New Year’s or a Christmas baby. All the doctors in our practice deliver their own babies, and I will be in town that week.” She grinned. “Try not to have it on a holiday, though, okay?”

“I’ll try,” Tori said, sensing the doctor was joking. Babies showed up when they chose and Tori had every intention of delivering naturally.

“Good. Here’s a prescription for prenatal vitamins. This next sheet I’m giving you is a list of the hospitals I deliver at. Most of them schedule tours of their maternity wards, so you’ll want to go visit them and decide which one you like best. Then let me know and we’ll get you pre-registered. That’s done about two months in advance.”

Dr. Hillyer handed over another sheet. “This one is a timetable of your office visits. I’ll see you once a month, then, as the date gets closer, we’ll schedule the appointments every two weeks, then weekly until the little one arrives. This last sheet is simply a list of symptoms to watch for. If you experience any of these, call my office immediately. Got that?”

“Got it,” Tori said. The doctor handed her a folder to put everything in.

Dr. Hillyer smiled. “Then, unless you have any other questions, you’re free to go. My nurse is Eileen Swikle. Ask for her whenever you call, and she’ll answer any questions you might have over the next six months. She’ll become your best friend through all this.”

“Thanks,” Tori said. She stood. “For now I’m good. Slightly overwhelmed, but good.”

“Understandable,” the doctor said with a nod. “First pregnancies are a learning experience. After that, the next one is a piece of cake. And you should know that you have no restrictions—sex, travel, working out. You’re free to indulge. Just remember no alcohol or smoking.”

“I don’t smoke and gave up drinking,” Tori said.

“Good girl,” Dr. Hillyer said, and with that, Tori was on her way to the scheduling desk, where she made her appointments through October. There was a moment when she turned a little queasy; the receptionist had a sliced turkey sandwich on her desk and for some reason the smell set Tori off. The woman quickly put it aside when she saw Tori go a little green.

Armed with her vitamin prescription and her folder, Tori left the office. As she stepped out into the afternoon sunshine, she sighed as the enormity of her pregnancy hit her. She’d seen her baby. This was actually happening.

Even though there had been definite lines on the pregnancy test, maybe the logical part of her hadn’t quite believed the results. The heat enveloped Tori as she hit the remote and unlocked her two-seater sports car. She loved the little convertible but she was going to have to trade it in for something more practical.

She slid onto the warm leather and ran her fingers across the steering wheel. She’d have to buy something with a back seat. She cringed as a minivan drove by the parking lot. No. She just couldn’t drive a minivan. Not yet. Surely there had to be something less “suburban mom.” She made a mental note to start researching what was out there.

Although it was hot enough to want to turn on the air conditioner and hide from the sun, Tori lowered the convertible top. She figured she might as well enjoy her toy a little longer. Her cell phone rang, and despite Jeff’s statistical lecture on why not to use it while driving, she popped in the earpiece and hit the connect button.

“Hey, I finished all my shopping, so I’m running early—I’m already here. Are you on your way?” Lauren asked.

“I just finished my last appointment, so I can head in that direction now,” Tori told her. Lauren had called last night and announced she was coming into town a day early for her aunt’s sixtieth birthday party. “Did you find a gift?”

“I did,” Lauren said. “It took me about five stores, but I finally found the right thing. This is the first real shopping I’ve done since having Hailey. A trip to the supermarket just doesn’t count.”

“I’m getting on the highway now. I’ll be there in thirty minutes, tops.” Tori accelerated, letting her hair blow as she made her way toward Country Club Plaza, Kansas City’s premier shopping area. Lauren was staying with her aunt, who lived nearby. Tori navigated the route easily and soon sat across from Lauren in one of the Plaza’s restaurants. The two ordered and were soon munching on appetizers as they discussed how Hailey was doing.

“Jeff says hi,” Lauren suddenly said, sliding in her words at a break in the conversation.

“Tell him I say hi, too,” Tori said, working to make her voice casual. She wasn’t sure how much Lauren knew. “Except for work, I haven’t seen him in a while.”

“He said you two were just friends now,” Lauren admitted. She watched Tori’s face carefully, looking for revealing expressions, but Tori remained matter-of-fact. “I wanted you to know that I hope you and I can always remain friends.”

“Of course we can,” Tori insisted. She took another bite of her salad and waved her fork in the air. “It’s better this way. Relationships just don’t work out when you’re in two different cities. Besides, it was probably time for both of us to move on.”

“It’s good you two can be friends,” Lauren noted.

“We were always friends first,” Tori said. At least that much was true. She took a drink of her water. Lauren was having a glass of wine and she took a sip, rolling the merlot she’d ordered over her tongue.

“Enjoying that?” Tori said, realizing that it would be at least another nine months before anything alcoholic touched her lips.

“Oh yes, I am,” Lauren said as she took another sip. “I never drink anything but water when I’m out with Hailey, so being out with another adult female means I can indulge a little.” She stabbed a piece of the thinly cut beef that topped her blue-cheese-and-steak salad. “This is good,” she said. “And the company is great, too.”

“Thanks,” Tori said. “You gave me an excuse to get away from the office.” With Lauren’s visit and the doctor’s appointment, Tori had taken the afternoon off.

“So how’s work?” Lauren asked.

“We won a major contract to redo Fredrikberg Finance’s network. They’re a loan brokerage with ten offices all over the city. We haven’t had a glitch during the procedure, but their president calls me every day anyway for reassurance.”

“Well, you look healthy,” Lauren said. “You’ve got a glow about you I haven’t seen before, so Kansas City must be agreeing with you.”

“It is,” Tori said. At least her job was.

After having dinner last night, Tori had decided to bite the bullet and tell her mother and stepfather about the baby.

Surprisingly the conversation had gone quite well. They’d quickly hidden any disappointment that there wasn’t a husband to go along with the baby and offered whatever help she required. When she thought about it, Tori realized her parents were quite excited they were going to have a grandchild.

So far she’d told no one else, although she now decided to call her friends. She still hadn’t decided what to say to Jeff. Tori took another bite of her salad. She’d given up all fattening foods the day of the pregnancy test, opting for only the healthiest things available. When she felt hungry, she munched on saltines or rice cakes. She missed chocolate-chip cookies terribly, but she was determined not to swell up to the size of a hot-air balloon.

“Earth to Tori,” Lauren said.

“Sorry,” Tori said. “My mind has been processing so much lately that sometimes it just shuts down.”

“I was like that when I was pregnant,” Lauren said. “It was as if, in utero, Hailey was absorbing all my brain cells. Justin called me a flake.”

“He didn’t,” Tori said, laughing.

“He did,” Lauren admitted with an expression of mock horror. “I only let him get away with it because he indulged all my strange cravings. I would want fried pickles, for instance, and he’d drive to O’Leary’s and get them. He’d even get me Ted Drewes or Fritz’s concretes at all odd hours. I also craved mashed potatoes and fajitas. The poor guy didn’t have a home-cooked meal for months.”

“I don’t cook very much, and I can’t stand sliced turkey anymore,” Tori said. “I just look at it now and want to puke.” Although the ice cream treats Lauren had just mentioned sounded heavenly.

Lauren’s expression turned quizzical. “I was that way with scrambled eggs. I couldn’t even be in the same room and smell them.”

“I’m fine with eggs,” Tori said, before she caught herself. What was she doing discussing cravings with Lauren, who didn’t even know she was pregnant? Now she had to use the ladies’ room. While she’d heard trips to the bathroom became more frequent as the baby grew, maybe it was also psychological. Or perhaps it was due to the eight glasses of water she consumed every day. “Excuse me a second,” she said, rising and heading to the restroom.

When she returned, Lauren was staring at her strangely. “So why haven’t you told Jeff you’re expecting?” she asked.

“What?” Tori slid into the seat and paused. “I’m not pregnant.”

“Then what would you call it?” Lauren asked. She pushed her blond hair behind her ears. “You forget that both my aunt and my mother work for obstetricians. I can spot a pregnant woman a mile away.”

Tori winced. She should have kept her mouth shut about her cravings.

“So, which doctor are you seeing?” Lauren asked.

“Dr. Hillyer,” Tori admitted, willing herself to keep her eyes open. At this moment she wanted nothing more than to close them and hide from the impending cloud of doom. Dropping through the floor was another option, if the tiles would be gracious enough to open up.

“When are you due?” Lauren asked.

“December thirtieth.”

“And Jeff’s the father and he’s in the dark,” Lauren continued.

“I just had my first visit with the doctor today,” Tori said. She fiddled with the cloth napkin. “I wanted to be sure I was pregnant before causing any undue excitement. You know how many things can go wrong in the first trimester.”

“You have to tell him,” Lauren said. She twirled her wineglass between her fingers, the red liquid swirling. She frowned before adding, “He has a right to know.”

“Yes, I know he does. And I will tell him,” Tori said. “Just not yet. I want to get a few other things sorted out on my end. But I promise that I’ll speak to him. Sometime. It’s better this way.”

“For who? You?” Lauren shook her head. “The longer you wait the worse it’s going to be. At some point he’s going to find out. He’s not stupid. He’s quite able to put two and two together. And can you imagine how he’s going to feel? He’ll want to be involved from the very beginning. You’d be keeping his child away from him.”

“It’s my child, too,” Tori said. “I want things sorted on my end first.”

“Yes, but you should allow him to be involved. He’s like his brother that way. Justin went to my checkups. He visited the hospitals with me. He went to my sono-gram appointments and held my hand when I gave blood. He did the grocery shopping when I was too tired. He even organized and helped fix up the nursery.”

“I can do that on my own,” Tori said stubbornly. “I’ve been taking care of myself for years and I’m sure I’ll be fine doing it pregnant. You and I both know that Jeff is much too busy. He’s out of town as we speak. He’s a nomad. I don’t want that life. I’m not settling for a man who’s never around. He and I talked long ago about our relationship—he wants sex, I want marriage. He’s admitted he’s not ready to settle down and pretty much indicated that if he were, it wouldn’t be with me. He doesn’t see me that way. I’m keeping my baby, but I’m not having it to trap him. The last thing I want is to win Jeff Wright because of his misguided sense of guilt.”

A silence fell for a few moments. “I’m sorry if that sounded harsh,” Tori said. “I have a lot on my plate. I agree he should be involved, but we’re over. I need to be the one to set the parameters of how involved he’s going to be. I’m not going back to the way it was.”

“And I can respect that,” Lauren said. “I believe a child should know both parents even if living together isn’t in the best interests of the parents.”

“In this case, it wouldn’t be good for either of us,” Tori said. “I was moving on with my life when this happened. I’m simply praying that Jeff will understand that we shouldn’t be together.”

“You don’t think he’ll make a good father, do you?” Lauren asked, as if she’d gained sudden insight into the workings of Tori’s mind.

“No, I have to admit I don’t,” Tori acknowledged. “I want what my mother has. I want what you and Justin have. Jeff, well, he’s got two priorities—work and his computer. You thought you were in love with Jeff once. You know exactly how single-minded he can be. It’s like he has tunnel vision.”

“I do know, and what I felt for him was a misguided crush,” Lauren said, clarifying the situation. “Justin quickly straightened me out. Okay, not so quickly. But Jeff and I aren’t compatible. You and he are. All of us can see that. You’re perfect for him.”

“Only because I put up with his nonsense longer than anyone else,” Tori said.

“Perhaps,” Lauren agreed. “But he talks about you all the time. I know he cares about you, and cares deeply.”

“He does care,” Tori said. “That’s never been an issue. But he cares for me the way he used to care for you—in that just-friends sense, only with me sex was added. While we may be great in bed, that’s not enough to make a marriage.”

“But what if he loved you?”

“He doesn’t. And I want the kind of love and affection that you and Justin share. The kind everyone can see. That’s not us. We didn’t do anything but sit around and watch movies. We were a couple, sort of. I’m tired of sort of. That’s why I called off the relationship and accepted this promotion. I want a husband who adores me and I can’t have that with Jeff. I need to take off the blinders so I can search for the right someone—someone who will be there forever. I’m not settling or marrying anyone until I’ve found that.”

“If you could see Jeff with Hailey, you wouldn’t even recognize him. He’s so good with her. She practically jumps out of my arms when she sees him,” Lauren defended.

“She probably thinks he’s Justin,” Tori said skeptically. She bit her lip. “Sorry. That was mean.”

Lauren shook her head. “It was, but I’ll forgive you because it’s a valid point and I worried about that myself. They are uncannily alike, but Hailey knows the difference. When they’re in the same room she goes to Justin and says Dada. She knows who Jeff is and who he’s not. You can tell that she loves her uncle very much, but she adores her father.”

Tori settled back against the chair. While deep down she wanted nothing more than the unconditional belief that Jeff would make an excellent father, he was terrible at expressing his feelings. “Yes, but Jeff’s great one-on-one like that. He keeps everyone in a certain compartment. He’s not with a child constantly. It’s like when he’s with me. We’re great in short bursts, but long-term, all day, every day? We’d be hating each other by the end of two weeks and that’s if we were lucky.”

“I think you’d be surprised. I thought life would be that way with Justin, but it wasn’t,” Lauren said. The two women had finished eating and Tori waved away the waiter’s offer of dessert.

“I’d like to be surprised, but I don’t believe I will be,” Tori said. “There’s too much history between us. The last thing I want is for us to marry and end up hating each other. Good things come to those who wait. I’m not afraid of being alone until the right man comes along.”

“You won’t be alone. You’ll be a mother,” Lauren pointed out.

“True,” Tori said. And her family had promised to help and support her. Even though she wouldn’t be in a relationship, everything was going to be fine. “I will tell him soon,” Tori promised. “Just say you won’t speak to him before I do.”

“Fine,” Lauren said. “I won’t. But if you don’t tell him in a few weeks, expect a phone call from me. This is not a secret I like keeping, but because we’re friends and have been since long before I married Justin, I’ll give you some time to sort things out. I can understand you wanting to make sure you’ve got your own thoughts straightened out, but don’t wait too long. You need to let him know before he finds out from someone else. You’ll be showing soon. Office workers talk. Don’t make him find out through the grapevine.”

“I won’t,” Tori assured her. “Just a few more weeks and I’ll figure out a way to tell him.”

“I’m going to hold you to that,” Lauren said. The matter settled, Tori and Lauren talked about other things until the check arrived, hugged each other goodbye and promised to keep in touch.

It wasn’t until Tori was in her car that she realized the full extent of her mistake. She’d been so intent on making sure Lauren didn’t tell Jeff, Tori had forgotten all about his twin. Lauren hadn’t promised not to tell Justin. Tori had to hope and trust that Lauren’s promise extended to her husband as well.

HER PHONE RANG as she merged into traffic on the way home. “Hi, Lisa.”

“Hey!” Lisa said. “I’m not catching you at a bad time, am I? I wanted you to know that Mark and I set a date. What are you doing the second weekend of August?”

“Coming to St. Louis?” Tori guessed. “Walking down the aisle?”

Lisa laughed. “Yes on both counts. I need you for the first two weekends in August, if you can get away from the office. There’s a shower for me the weekend before the wedding and we’re getting married the next. The reception is at Mark’s parents’ house. You don’t have a Neiman-Marcus department store in Kansas City, do you?”

“I’ll check the Web site, but right now I’d say no.”

“Rats. You’ll love the dresses and don’t worry, they’re really reasonable. Anyway, Cecile’s getting measured at the store on Michigan Avenue, so why don’t you come here? How’s this weekend?”

“I’m actually going to be in St. Louis next Monday for a meeting with Jared. How about we meet after that?” Tori suggested. “I’m coming in on Sunday anyway.”

“Only if you come in earlier so we can do dinner, too,” Lisa said. “Joann’s going to be in town this weekend, as well, so we can all get together like old times.”

“Twist my arm.” Tori laughed. “You know how much I like to eat. So put this Sunday on your calendar and send me an e-mail confirmation. I should remember, but I’m driving and don’t have a hand free to pencil it in.”

“That’s why you sound like you’re in a tunnel,” Lisa said with a chuckle. “I’ll do it right now. So will you be bringing anyone new to the wedding?”

“No,” Tori said. “Haven’t met anyone.”

“Well, Mark has some single friends who are flying in. One of them can serve as your date. Just as friends. No matchmaking.”

“Only if you promise.”

“Still doing the Internet dating thing?” Lisa asked.

Tori put her blinker on and switched lanes. “About to give it up. I never found anyone interesting. E-mail me all the information about the dress and the wedding events and I’ll put it on my calendar. I’ll see you this weekend.”

“I’ll do that today,” Lisa promised.

“You’re happy, aren’t you?” Tori asked.

“Very,” Lisa said, not missing a beat. Tori could hear the contentment in her friend’s voice.

“Good,” Tori said, satisfied that Lisa had made the right choice. She wanted nothing more than for Lisa to be happy for the rest of her life.

Tori disconnected and hit the on-ramp for the highway. This weekend she’d tell both Joann and Lisa about the baby. She hadn’t wanted to tell Lisa over the phone. She knew her friends well enough to know that face-to-face chats were always best for news such as this.




Chapter Four


“You’re kidding me. I did hear you right, didn’t I? You’re pregnant.”

Tori averted her gaze and toyed with her iced tea, using the long spoon to create a tiny whirlpool in the tall glass. She was sitting in the Meyers’ four-season room, surrounded only by Joann and Lisa. Instead of dining out, Joann’s husband, Kyle, and brother, Mark, who was also Lisa’s fiancé, had barbecued. The men had since gone inside to watch the Cardinals baseball game, leaving the women to socialize.

Joann gazed at Tori. “You cannot go silent now. My ears are not shot from having kids. I believe you said you’re pregnant.”

“I did,” Tori said slowly. “You heard me correctly. Nothing’s wrong with your ears.”

“No, but something is wrong with your mouth. You didn’t say anything to us until today,” Lisa jumped in. “How long have you known? You should have called when you first suspected.”

“How far along are you?” Joann asked. She’d lifted her water goblet to her lips.

“My due date’s December thirtieth,” Tori said.

“Oh my God,” Lisa said, her jaw dropping as she worked the math. She frowned. “That means you got pregnant—”

“Back in April sometime,” Joann finished. She tapped her glass with a manicured nail. “That’s an awful long time ago. I’m sure you had quite a few opportunities to spill the beans and share what was going on.”

“I know,” Tori said. She crossed and uncrossed her legs. She wore shorts and a casual sweater.

“So, spill,” Lisa commanded. “We’re a little disappointed that we’re finding out weeks later so you better tell us why and how—all the details. We’re your best friends. We could have been there for you.”

“Right,” Joann said. She brushed some lint off her camp shirt. “That’s the real reason we’re all so frustrated. We haven’t been able to be a part of this with you. We’ve already drifted so much, and it’s news like this that keeps us together.”

“I didn’t even know until I was about eight weeks along,” Tori said, which was the truth. Her friends nodded, encouraging her to continue. “I had some spotting after the first four weeks and then no period after the next month. That’s when I finally went and bought a test. Stress has thrown off my cycles before and I had just moved to Kansas City and, well, after the test I wanted to wait until I saw the doctor before I announced anything. I didn’t want to be like Alicia.” Tori mentioned one of their sorority sisters.

“I remember that. She thought she was pregnant, went out and told everyone and then the doctor said she wasn’t,” Lisa said. “She cried for days.”

“She did get pregnant the next month, though,” Joann noted. “She and her husband had been trying for a while for a child.”

“Well, I didn’t want that to happen to me. I knew for sure the day you called me to tell me the wedding date,” she said, nodding at Lisa. “But I decided to tell you in person instead.”

“Okay, we understand. We’re still going to dish out maybe a smidgen more guilt for you having kept us in the dark, but you know we’re only doing that because we love you.”

“Yeah,” Tori said, her insides warming. Her friends were always there for her.

“Besides, this gives us something to do after the wedding. We’ll have to do baby showers and shopping and such,” Lisa added.

“I haven’t even thought that far ahead,” Tori said. “I’m still crying from having to give up my cute convertible at some point in the near future. I asked fate for change, but this isn’t what I was expecting when I broke up with Jeff and moved to Kansas City. Nothing has gone the way I planned.”





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