Книга - The Doctor’s Reason to Stay

The Doctor's Reason to Stay
Dianne Drake






Then he kissed her. Tender kisses in a row, leading to her jaw.

Edie tried to steady herself, tried willing herself to be calm, tried thinking of this as only a kiss—but as his lips first touched her flesh her knees nearly buckled underneath her, causing her to hold on to Rafe for dear life lest she slid to the ground at his feet. So, as her arms reached up to entwine themselves around his neck, rather than saying or doing anything that would spoil this perfect moment, Edie simply breathed out the longest, most satisfied sigh she’d ever sighed, and let the tingle of his lips trailing down the back of her neck take over.

“Maybe we should stop,” she finally managed, when it was obvious he was ready to start yet another exploration. She didn’t want to stop, though. Not anything. But common sense was the only barrier between her and a broken heart, and she was just coming to realize that Rafe was the first man—the only man—who could break her heart.


A new trilogy from Dianne Drake:

With THE DOCTOR’S REASON TO STAYDianne Drake welcomes you to the first story in her New York Hospital Heartthrobs trilogy

Three gorgeous guys return home to upstate New York. It’s a place they love to hate—until they each find a bride amidst the bustle of a very special hospital.


Dear Reader,

Welcome to New York Hospital Heartthrobs, a trilogy about coming home. And, I’d like to introduce you to Rafe Corbett, Jess Corbett and Rick Navarro, three real heartthrobs who have their own ideas about home. When I first learned I was going to write these books, I knew instantly that I wanted a theme about the place to which we are all connected—home. But I wanted more than that. I wanted to write stories about what compels people to want to go home and binds their hearts to that special place. In this group of stories, it was the love of a generous woman who touched countless lives…a woman much like your own mother, grandmother or aunt.

Cherished memories…that’s what home is to me, and that’s what home becomes for the heroes and heroines of New York Hospital Heartthrobs. Of course, going home isn’t always the easiest thing to do. Just ask Rafe Corbett, in The Doctor’s Reason to Stay. He hasn’t been home for thirteen years, and has no intention of staying once he’s attended his aunt’s funeral. But it seems that a five-year-old girl named Molly, and a Child Life Specialist by the name of Edie Parker, have other plans for Rafe because, for some reason, he just can’t get away, even though he’s trying. Somewhere in his struggles to escape, though, Rafe finds a brand new definition of home. The question is, can he trust that home is truly where the heart is?

I hope you enjoy Rafe and Edie’s discoveries in The Doctor’s Reason to Stay. Then please, come back to see what doctor-turned-firefighter, Jess Corbett and nurse/paramedic, Julie Clark, are up to in my next Heartthrob story. And, as always, I love hearing from you, so please feel free to email me at Dianne@DianneDrake.com (mailto:Dianne@DianneDrake.com)

Wishing you health & happiness!

Dianne


Now that her children have left home, Dianne Drake is finally finding the time to do some of the things she adores—gardening, cooking, reading, shopping for antiques. Her absolute passion in life, however, is adopting abandoned and abused animals. Right now Dianne and her husband Joel have a little menagerie of three dogs and two cats, but that’s always subject to change. A former symphony orchestra member, Dianne now attends the symphony as a spectator several times a month and, when time permits, takes in an occasional football, basketball or hockey game.

Recent titles by the same author:

FROM BROODING BOSS TO ADORING DAD

THE BABY WHO STOLE THE DOCTOR’S HEART*

CHRISTMAS MIRACLE: A FAMILY*

HIS MOTHERLESS LITTLE TWINS*

NEWBORN NEEDS A DAD*

*Mountain Village Hospital


The Doctor’s

Reason to Stay

Dianne Drake






www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)




CONTENTS


Chapter One (#uec958dc7-5bb6-5452-9c5e-e84a014332d5)

Chapter Two (#u22c0c8ca-3383-5ad1-b772-dbb7af24cf80)

Chapter Three (#uf24def1a-8e08-5577-a020-ad0e16f025a7)

Chapter Four (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Five (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Six (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Seven (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Eight (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter Nine (#litres_trial_promo)

Epilogue (#litres_trial_promo)




CHAPTER ONE


WHOEVER said you couldn’t go home again was right, in part. He was home in the physical sense now, sitting in an old wicker chair, sipping a tall glass of lemonade, with his feet propped up on the white rail separating the porch from the masses of purple and pink flowering hydrangeas traversing the front and both sides of Gracie House. Emotionally, though, Dr. Rafe Corbett was distanced from this place. Distanced by miles and year upon year of memories and pain yet so acute that more than a decade of separation felt like mere seconds. Distanced was the way he wanted to stay, however. But it was hard to do that right now, when half the population of Lilly Lake, New York, expected something of the family prodigal finally returned home.

“I see you,” he said to the child sneaking up behind him. Molly Corbett, not any blood relation to him but his aunt’s ward, was truly alone in the world now, and his heart did go out to her.

“Do not,” she said, a little too shy for the usually outgoing girl.

“Do too,” he replied. “You’re wearing a red dress.” Rafe flinched, thinking about Molly, then thinking about his aunt. Grace Corbett been the best person in his life, and the fact that she was gone now really hadn’t sunk in. Logically, he knew she’d had a heart attack. Emotionally, he wasn’t ready to deal with it. Wasn’t ready to cry, or grieve, or even miss her yet, because some part of him expected her to walk through her door, tell him it was all a big mistake, maybe even a scheme to get him home to Lilly Lake. God knew, she’d tried everything she could think of these past thirteen years, to no avail.

“It’s yellow, silly,” she said.

“That’s what I said. You’re wearing a yellow dress.” But, then, there was Molly, to remind him. Big, sad eyes. Clingy. His heart ached for her. She was five, and he didn’t know what she understood, or didn’t understand. And he, sure as hell, wasn’t the one who should be trying to relate to her.

“It’s not a dress,” she countered, not giving over to the giggles like she normally had when Aunt Grace had brought her along on her visits.

Sighing, Rafe thought about his aunt, a larger-than-life lady who’d squeezed every last drop out of every last day the good Lord had given her. Horsewoman, humanitarian, entrepreneur, philanthropist…and what he was going to miss the most, something very simple—her chocolate-chip cookies. Once a month, come rain, shine, or any other adversity in the universe, she’d met him somewhere on neutral ground, somewhere other than Lilly Lake, and given him a tin of her cookies. Had every month for thirteen years. He’d always looked forward to it…to the cookies, but most of all to his visit with his aunt. And they’d never missed a month, until this month.

“I didn’t say it was a dress. It’s yellow pants.”

“No, it’s not,” Molly said, stepping up right behind him.

“Shoes.”

“No.”

“Socks.”

“No.”

He’d been trying to draw her out the whole time he’d been here, without any luck. Oh, she’d respond when she had to. But that was all. Flat, polite responses. No emotion. Only rote words. “Hat. Purse. Hair ribbons.”

“Shirt. It’s a yellow shirt.” Said with polite impatience. But who could blame her? She missed Aunt Grace, at least as much as he did. Maybe more, as Grace had been all the child had ever had, ever known.

Damn, he was going to miss his aunt. The ache of not having her around any more was starting to knot inside him, threatening to choke him, or double him over with grief. But Molly couldn’t see that. She needed to see strength right now. All he could muster for her. All he could fake for what he was about to do…to give her away. “And that’s exactly what I said. A yellow shirt. I saw you sneaking up behind me in your yellow shirt.” Over the years, Aunt Grace had taken in numerous children. She’d raised them, tutored them, fostered them, cared for them, or simply given them shelter when they’d needed it—all ages, all races and nationalities. None of it had mattered when a child had been in need of a home or even a bed for a few nights. “So, Miss Molly-in-the-yellow-shirt. Are you hungry?” He asked even though he was pretty sure she was not. She’d barely eaten a thing these past few days. As her short-term, stand-in guardian, he was concerned for her well-being. As a doctor, he was worried about her health. So much grief at such a young age wasn’t good. “Can I fix you something to eat, Molly? Maybe get you an apple, or a glass of milk? Anything you want.”

She stepped around to the front of the chair and stood directly in front of him, but at a distance. She always kept her distance. She shook her head, the way she’d done every time he’d asked since he’d been here.

“Are you tired? Do you need a nap?” She hadn’t been sleeping well either.

She shook her head again.

“Are you bored? Is there something you’d like to go play with? Maybe there’s a toy you’d like for me to buy you?”

This time Molly didn’t even bother shaking her head. She simply stood there, staring at him with some kind of expectation that made him uneasy because he couldn’t interpret it. Her big blue eyes were practically boring through him, telling him he should know something, or do something. But what?

That was the way it had been since he’d arrived for the funeral, four days ago, and nothing was changing except the way he felt. Molly was making him more nervous by the day. Making him feel the inadequacy he knew she was seeing. Maybe even making him feel guilty for the way he was going to have to upset her life more than it was already upset. It was something he truly hated doing, as Aunt Grace had dearly loved this child. But what he had to do was clear. He couldn’t keep her, couldn’t raise a child, couldn’t give her the things she needed, so he’d find her someone who would.

But Rafe’s heart did go out to Molly in ways he hadn’t expected. She’d only lived in Aunt Grace’s world, that was all she’d ever known, and now it was going to be taken away from her. She was young, though. As cute as any kid he’d ever seen. And smart. So surely some nice family looking to adopt and adore a child would be anxious to give Molly the good home she needed, the one he wanted for her. He was sure of it. Although he was also sure that being ripped from her home, the way she was going to be, would break her young heart.

That, alone, had cost him a couple nights’ sleep, trying to figure out how to prevent it from happening. Problem was, there wasn’t a good solution to this bad situation. He couldn’t stay in Lilly Lake, and he couldn’t take Molly home to live with him in his world. Neither way would work—not for Molly, not for him.

“Do you have to go to the bathroom, Molly?” he persisted, not sure what he’d do if she said yes. But much to his relief, she shook her head again.

“Look, sweetheart. You’re going to have to tell me what you want. If you need me to do something for you, or get you something…anything…I will, but I have to know what it is.” He was losing patience. Not with Molly, but with himself for not being able to connect to her. He, of all people, knew what it was like to be alone, to feel that deep-down kind of isolation. But he didn’t know how to deal with it, or overcome it—not in Molly, not even in himself. On top of that, he was sure Molly wasn’t totally aware of what was really going on. Maybe she had some understanding of Aunt Grace’s death. Maybe she had a sense of what that meant or, perhaps, she’d guessed that it was a bad thing. But he didn’t believe she truly knew that her life was about to change in big ways, ways that made him feel pretty damned guilty.

Having the proverbial rug pulled out from underneath you was never good. His own rug had been pulled out so many times he couldn’t even remember most of them any more. Or tried not to remember them. Anyway, what he did recall was Aunt Grace always being there for him, being the one to save him and love him and protect him each and every time that rug had been yanked. The way she’d done with Molly when she’d been literally thrown away, abandoned at birth in a trash can in a bus station.

Except Molly didn’t remember that, of course. What she would remember, though, was the day Aunt Grace had gone away and never come back, and changed her life for ever.

It was a sadness he shared with Molly, something they had in common. A starting place for the two of them that neither one could quite reach. It was also a terrible pain he was only now beginning to feel, one that Molly shouldn’t have to deal with. But he didn’t know how to protect her from it. “Does your tummy hurt?” he asked, continuing to grapple for what was bothering her.

In answer, she sighed, which made him feel even worse for not knowing. This was when he would have asked his aunt what was wrong with the child, and she would have known instantly. Except he was on his own here. Everyone had finally gone home. Summer Adair, his aunt’s nurse, had returned to her old life, whatever that was. Mrs. Murdock, the housekeeper, was with her sister for a few days. His brother, Jess, had returned to his life in New York City after the funeral. Even Johnny Redmond, the man who looked after all Aunt Grace’s horses, and ran her equestrian rescue charity, was keeping to the stables. Meaning it was just Molly and him now, and one of them was at a total loss.

“How about we go for ice cream? Would you like that?”

“Can I see Edie, please?” Molly finally asked.

Edie…a name he didn’t recognize. “Is she one of your little playmates? Because you’re welcome to invite her over. Or I could take you to her house to play, if that’s OK with her parents.”

No response from Molly. She simply continued standing there, staring at him, causing the tension between them to rise to the point that it was giving him a dull headache. One little girl inducing more pressure than he’d ever felt when he was in surgery. Truth be told, it was grinding him down. Besides losing sleep, he’d lost his appetite. Of course, that could also be the effect of coming home to Lilly Lake, where bad memories infused the very air he breathed. But Rafe had an idea Molly played a big part in his queasy feelings as he truly didn’t relish the idea of what he had to do. So finally, in desperation, he said, “Look, Molly, why don’t you run up to your room and play for a little while so I can make a phone call? After that, we’ll figure out what to do with the rest of the day.” Other than simply hanging around, staring at each other, not having a grasp on how to remedy the situation. “OK?”

On impulse, he held out his hand to Molly, and she grabbed hold quickly. Clung tightly as the two of them made their way through the house, now emptied of all its guests, and parted company when she continued on upstairs and he didn’t. Rafe watched until Molly turned the corner, then he continued standing there until he heard the sound of her door shutting. “What am I going to do, Aunt Grace?” he asked her portrait hanging over the fireplace mantel in the parlor, on his way to the study to put out a distress call to the man most likely to know what to do. “It’s a hell of a mess you’ve gotten me into, so the least you could do would be to tell me how I’m supposed to get myself out of it and do what’s right for Molly at the same time.”

Rafe actually paused for a moment, like he expected an answer from his aunt. Then, when he realized how absurd that was, he continued on his way, thinking about how really alone he was in this. It was him, no one else. Jess had his responsibilities elsewhere, and his own private hell to wade through every waking minute of every day. Then after Jess, there was…no one. Absolutely no one. Sure, Rafe could have easily turned and walked away, and let Aunt Grace’s attorney handle the remaining affairs for him. One of those being Molly. But that wasn’t the kind of person he was. He was…dutiful. That was what Aunt Grace had always said about him. Jess was sunny, Rafe was dutiful.

Except these days Jess was sad and Rafe was…well, he wasn’t sure what he was. But he sure as hell was sure what he was not, which was daddy material!

The dutiful tag, though, was the thing causing the tension to quadruple in him right this very minute, as finding Molly a new family seemed almost cruel at this particular time. But she needed love, and that was something he knew nothing about. More than that, had no earthly desire to learn about. Love caused pain, and he’d had enough pain to last a lifetime. That attitude probably made him selfish, but so be it. He’d loved his aunt, he loved his brother. But no one else. It was a hard choice, but he was OK with it, for himself. Molly stood a chance at better things in this world, however, and she needed the kind of love he simply didn’t have in him.

So with the resolve firmly in place that he was going to find that perfect adoptive situation for her, Rafe stepped into the study to phone the man he hoped would do most of the solving for him and shut the door behind him, grateful for the thick wooden walls that had always felt so safe to him when he was a child. All those nights when his dad had been drunk, or bellowing for the sake of bellowing, this was where he’d found his sanctuary, in Aunt Grace’s study right across the street from his own private hell. In the red leather chair behind her desk, where she’d let him sit.

He ran his fingers over the back of the chair, picturing himself as a little boy, feeling so safe and important there. For a moment, when he sat down, he could almost see Aunt Grace standing across the desk from him, telling him to take a few deep breaths to help him calm down.

“Calm down,” he said to himself, taking those few deep breaths, noticing, for the first time, a small, custom-made desk in the corner of the room. An exact replica of Grace’s massive mahogany desk. Next to it, an exact replica of the leather chair. For Molly. The way it had been for Jess and him, and countless others.

“I don’t suppose there’s a simple way out of this, is there?” he asked Henry Danforth. Henry was Aunt Grace’s confidant, her lawyer.

“Do you actually believe your aunt would have made things simple for you, son? She left this world the way she lived in it day after day…and you know how that was.”

He did. In a word…complicated. “So tell me, what am I going to do about Molly?” Glancing at the big leather chair, then the smaller replica, he felt the first real knot of emotion constrict his throat. I’ll do my best, Aunt Grace. I promise, I’ll do my best. “And do you know where I can I can find her little playmate called Edie?”

* * *

“Shall I let him in?” Betty Richardson, Edie Parker’s secretary, asked from the door separating her office from Edie’s. “He’s not on the appointment list, but he said he’s here about Molly, so I figured you’d want to talk to him.”

Rafe stepped up behind Betty, expecting to find little Edie’s mother, ready to plead his case to her, but Edie, as it turned out, wasn’t so little. And she wasn’t anything close to the kind of friend Rafe expected Molly to have. In fact, his first impression was that Molly’s friend was a very curvaceous friend indeed. Stunningly so. “You’re sure that’s Edie Parker?” he asked Betty, simply to make sure.

“That’s Edie,” she confirmed, stepping out of Rafe’s way.

One without a wedding ring, he noted at first glance as he looked around the ample figure of the secretary. He also noted the long blonde hair, the blue eyes, the impeccable smile. Edie Parker, or Edith Louise Parker, as it stated on her name plaque, shoved her desk chair back and stood, staring straight at the man who hadn’t waited but had followed her secretary through the office door. Yet before she could speak, Molly shot around him and ran straight into Edie’s arms. “Edie,” she squealed. “I was afraid I’d never get to come see you again.”

Edie scooped her right in. “You know I’d have come out to Gracie House to see you,” she said, holding on to Molly for all she was worth. “I’ve missed you. We’ve all missed you.”

“I don’t like it there any more, Edie. It’s too…quiet.”

Edie glanced up briefly at Rafe. “Then we’re going to have to see about you coming back to work here, at the hospital, as soon as possible. We have a lot of things for you to do. Janie, in the gift shop, needs someone to straighten her shelves. And André, in the kitchen, needs some help getting his pantry rearranged. Oh, and Dr. Rick mentioned, just yesterday, that he needs someone to help him pick out what kind of fish he’s going to put into the new aquarium in the front lobby.”

“I like yellow-striped fish,” Molly said, almost shyly. “The ones with the blue stripes.”

“Then that’s something you and Dr. Rick should talk about.”

For a moment, watching the exchange between Edie and Molly, the only thing that came to Rafe’s mind was the phrase from an old song…something about the mother and child reunion being only a motion away…That was what it looked like he was witnessing right now, not just on Molly’s part but on Edie Parker’s as well. He was surprised how well they connected. Pleased, actually, as he hadn’t observed that kind of emotion in Molly since he’d been here, and he’d worried about it. But witnessing Molly with Edie, he was pretty sure there was nothing to worry about. For the first time, Molly appeared a perfectly normal little girl. “I, um…Molly wanted to see you,” he said to Edie, somewhat awkwardly. “Didn’t mean to interrupt anything, but I didn’t know what else to do for her. It’s been pretty difficult these past few days.”

Glancing up from her embrace, Edie answered him with a soft smile. “That’s fine. I’ve been worried about Molly, and she’s always welcome here. I’d thought about stopping by Gracie House, but I didn’t want to intrude on your family at a time like this, though, so I’ve stayed away.” She tried pushing back from Molly a bit, but the child clung ferociously. “But I am sorry for your loss, Dr. Corbett. We all loved your aunt. Dearly. She was a kind, caring woman. Full of compassion. She’s already missed.”

Yes, she’d been all that, and more. “I appreciate your sentiment, Miss Parker.”

“Please, call me Edie,” she said, her voice so collected and reassuring it reminded him, in a way, of his aunt’s voice.

He smiled. “I appreciate your sentiment, Edie. It’s been a difficult few days for everybody, and I’m not sure any of us have even begun to feel just how much she’s going to be missed.”

“If there’s anything I can do…”

He saw sincerity in her eyes. Saw genuine affection for Molly, too, and wondered…“Maybe there is. Molly hasn’t been eating well, or sleeping. I thought that spending some time with one of her playmates might help, but obviously you’re not a playmate. Maybe, though, you can point me in the direction of one of her playmates.”

“Actually, in a way, I am a playmate. I’m the hospital’s child life specialist, which does entitle me to play with the children, along with a few other more professional-type duties.” She laughed. “Although I’ll admit to a real fondness for the play aspects of the job.”

“Child life specialist. Isn’t that a position you’d be more inclined to find in a pediatric hospital, or a hospital with a large pediatric department?” A position about which he knew nothing at all as he kept himself locked away in the orthopedic surgery for half his practicing life, and in his office for the other half.

“Usually, but Dr. Navarro, our Chief of Staff, has plans to enlarge our pediatric ward here, and your aunt wanted me on staff before that started, to serve as an ad visor for the expansion.” Pushing back from Molly, she straightened up. “Oh, and in case it wasn’t clear, Molly has been my assistant for the past three months. She’s very important to the child life program we’re setting up.” She smiled, not at Rafe but at Molly…“An advisor.”

“I have!” Molly agreed eagerly.

Rafe noted the animation in her, pleased to see it. Something about Edie Parker was causing that in Molly. Of course, as pretty as Edie was, something about her would probably cause that kind of animation in any man, including himself, fortunate enough to be around her for very long.

“When Aunt Grace comes here to work, I get to help Edie sometimes. And sometimes I get to help other people here, too, because I have lots of jobs. So, when Aunt Grace comes back, I’ll come back and help again. Won’t I, Edie? Just like I used to before she went away?”

Rafe and Edie exchanged troubled looks, Rafe’s twisting from troubled into downright panicked. He didn’t know what to say, didn’t know what to do, and that must have shown quite clearly on him, as Edie jumped in for the rescue.

“Look, Molly,” she said. “Right now, what I need you to do is go and help Betty. She’s in the middle of a very important project, and she has a job for you.” She held out her hand to Molly, and took her to the reception area, where Betty put the girl to work rearranging the boxes of toys Edie kept on hand for the kids she worked with. A very important job, in Molly’s estimation. “Also, make sure nothing is broken, and if you see any toys in there that aren’t clean, give them to Betty to sanitize.” Edie turned to Rafe, then winked. “Molly knows how important it is to keep our toys clean.”

The wink definitely caught him off guard, but so did the way Molly went right at her task, separating the toys into three boxes, one for boys, one for girls, and one for everybody, being careful to inspect each and every one. For the first time since he’d returned to Lilly Lake, he was actually seeing Molly smile. More than ever, that was a sure sign that he had no business taking care of a child. He didn’t know what it took to cause her to smile, even though he’d made awkward attempts. Didn’t know how to assess her needs. In fact, everything he did felt wrong. And that feeling of inadequacy was only emphasized by Molly’s absence of response to his feeble attempts. The fact that even after he’d told Molly that Grace had died, her lack of understanding merely underlined his ineptness, which told him that even though he felt miserable disrupting Molly’s life so much, what he had to do was the right thing.

“I figured she’d have some problems coping with my aunt’s death,” he said, once Edie shut her office door, “but I had no idea she didn’t understand it at all. I’m sure you’ve already seen how much I don’t know about kids.”

“Don’t worry about it, Doctor. Children adjust in their own way, in their own good time. Right now, Molly’s just processing what’s happening to her. For a child, it’s difficult. But give her a little while to work through it. I’m sure she will, but if, for some reason, she doesn’t, we’ll try approaching it a different way, something she’s better able to cope with. And that’s all it’s about at her age…finding that one special way that will help her cope. Because, honestly, I do think she understands. It’s more a matter of her trying to figure out how to handle what she knows. That’s most likely where Molly’s still confused, which is why it’s easier for her to ignore everything that’s happened and simply return to a time when it was easier for her.” She reached out, and laid a reassuring hand on his arm. “However it happens, Dr. Corbett, we’ll work through it.”

He glanced down at her hand, surprised by the sensation running up his arm. A tingle? “Please, call me Rafe,” he said, sounding just the slightest bit unsteady.

“Rafe,” she replied, gesturing him to the chair across from her desk.

He opted to stand next to the door, however. Ready to escape, maybe? Ready to throw in the towel and admit that he was totally out of his league here, and it bothered him because he was used to being the one in charge? “So, in your experience, how long does this processing take?”

Edie sat down behind her desk, folded her hands patiently and precisely in front of her, then stared up at him. “You really don’t know a thing about children, do you?”

“It shows that much?”

She laughed. “You might as well be carrying a sign broadcasting it. Meaning I think you’re going to need a lot of help. Probably more than you know.”

Suddenly, the tension in him melted away. He liked Molly’s friend, and he was certainly glad she wasn’t a little playmate. In fact, he was very glad about that. “Do you like horses, Edie?” he asked impulsively, as the urge to ride hit him. He hadn’t done it in years. Had put it away as part of a past he’d never wanted to revisit. Now he wanted to ride, probably the only thing that had ever made him truly happy when he’d been a kid and, more surprisingly, he didn’t want to ride solitary the way he’d done more often than not back then. In fact, he could almost picture the three of them on the trail together—him, Molly, Edie. Odd, the picture of it developing. But pleasant. And totally unexpected.

“Real horses, toy horses?”

He chuckled. “Real horses. Leather saddle. A ride in the country.” An idea with growing appeal.

“Horses are OK, I guess, from a distance. Why do you ask?”

“I’ve just decided to take Molly on a ride out to the lake later this afternoon for a picnic, and I was wondering if you’d like to come with us, maybe give me my first lesson in everything I need to know about children. Assuming that when you told me I needed help, you were also offering it.”

She thought about it for a moment. Frowned, then asked, “And the horse thing…is that negotiable? The only horse I’ve ever ridden was a mechanical one on a carousel, and once it started going up and down, I jumped off and sat on the bench seat, the one reserved for the cowards and elderly couples who wanted to ride and reminisce.”

Rafe laughed out loud, something he hadn’t done in a while. Being stuck in Lilly Lake for the next few days didn’t seem as bad now as it had only a few minutes ago. Actually, he was beginning to look forward to it.

Yes, he definitely liked Molly’s friend.




CHAPTER TWO


WHAT in the world had she done? Had she really accepted a date with a total stranger? Maybe even instigated it a little?

In a sense, Rafe was familiar to her. Grace had spoken about him so often she almost felt like she knew him. Well, some of him. And he was, after all, Molly’s…well, she wasn’t really sure what he would be called. Temporary guardian? Honorary uncle? Adopted cousin? Soon-to-be father? That was the one she hoped for. But however Rafe defined himself in that relationship, it was a difficult situation all the way round, and the day Grace Corbett had asked her to look out for Molly, she hadn’t anticipated just how difficult it was going to get, or how much looking out she might be called on to do.

“I have a medical condition,” Grace had said. “Don’t think I’m going to have much more time here, and I want you to promise me that you’ll help Molly through this. I want Rafe to be her guardian and I’m going to need someone special, like you, to make sure my nephew does all the right things for her. He’s got to be taught that he can take care of a child, Edie. And that he can love her. Rafe’s a good man who doesn’t know he has that potential in him, and I want you to guide him to that potential, to that place where he knows he can bewhat Molly needs, because he needs Molly as much as she’s going to need him. But he’s got to discover that for himself, with some gentle nudges from you.”

That was why Grace had hired her, as a matter of fact. For her abilities as a child life specialist primarily, but also for those gentle nudges. Sure, the hospital pediatric department was expanding in new directions, and having a child life specialist on staff was a smart move, especially in the initial stages of the new services. But hiring her months in advance, even before the changes were to start…At first, Edie had thought it was simply good fortune, or being in the right place at the right time. But when Grace had come to her, that was when Edie had known her being there was as much about taking care of Molly as it was taking care of the children who would come to the new pediatric ward.

Funny, but in a way Grace had reminded Edie of her mother. Strong, compassionate women, both of them, always putting the needs of their children first. Edie missed her mother terribly, missed Grace, too, and, in a way, felt that maybe the two of them had connected in some karmic fashion to guide her life to this place and time, even though her mother had died years before Edie had even met Grace.

Grace had taken a big chance hiring Edie straight out of school, with no real work experience in the field except what she’d done as a student. In fact, Grace hadn’t batted an eye when Edie had walked into her office that day and explained how she’d been delayed in her education, which was why she was graduating at the age of thirty-two rather than a full decade earlier, as most people in her position did. None of that had mattered to Grace. She’d hired Edie almost immediately. So now, for the unusual opportunity Edie had been given, she owed it to Grace to fulfill her most fervent wish. Yes, she’d teach, nudge, or otherwise encourage Dr. Rafe Corbett in the many ways he should care for Molly. Of course, loving that child was something Rafe was going to have to do on his own. Edie certainly couldn’t force that. But Molly was easy to love. So very easy…

A knock on her office door jarred Edie’s attention. “Are you busy?” Dr. Rick Navarro asked, opening the door several inches and poking his head in.

“Not really. Just trying to figure out why I got myself into a horseback ride later on, considering how horses scare me to death.”

Rick chuckled. “Riding a horse is like riding a bike…only bigger, and bumpier. Horses do have a little more personality than a bicycle, though. But, trust me, once you mount up, you’re going to see there’s nothing else like it in the world. It’s an amazing feeling, being on the back of a horse. Nothing you can duplicate with anything else. Think of it as a great big bike with legs instead of wheels, and you’ll do fine.”

“You have horse experience?” she asked.

“Not so much lately. But when I was a boy…my mother was housekeeper for a man who had a stable, so I got to ride just about whenever I wanted.”

She could picture Rick on a horse, actually, sitting tall and rugged in the saddle. Not anything like the way she could picture herself…hunched over, shaking, holding on for dear life. “Suppose I was to tell you I’ve never learned how to ride a bike? That they scared me, too.” As had so many things in her young life. Truth was, she’d never really had a young life. Most of the time it didn’t matter. Sometimes, it did.

“Then I’d say you should plan on calling in sick tomorrow, because you’re going to be too stiff and sore to get out of bed. And my prescription for that, by the way, will be a nice, long soak in a tub of hot water.”

She really liked Rick. He was not only a great hospital administrator, he was an amazing doctor. He cared. Took time with his patients. Treated his staff with respect. Unfortunately, there were rumors floating around that he might leave now that Grace was gone and her two nephews had inherited the hospital. She was keeping her fingers crossed, though, that the rumors weren’t based on fact. Lilly Hospital needed Ricardo Navarro. He brought the heart and soul to it that so many other hospitals lacked. “Well, I think maybe I’ll stop by Physical Therapy later on and see if they’ve got any other advice for me. Or put in my reservation for one of their traction machines, since that’s probably where I’ll be spending the next few days…in traction.”

“Cervical or back traction?” he asked, chuckling.

“Both.”

“You could stay off the horse. Admire it from afar, but stay away.”

Easier said than done, if she wanted to go on that picnic with Rafe and Molly, which she really wanted to do. Probably more than she was even going to admit. Her life had never really afforded her much in the way of picnics, playtime, holidays or simply relaxation, and she was looking forward to this outing. To most of it, anyway. “Or tie myself to the saddle once I’m there.”

“You could also ask for a horse with short legs. The trip to the ground isn’t as far and it’s less painful that way.” His expression sobered. “Look, Edie, getting back to work, we’re admitting a boy through Emergency right now. Keith Baldwin. He has a ruptured appendix, and he’ll be going to the operating room in about thirty minutes. I need you to go down to Emergency, explain the surgery to him, make sure he understands everything that will be happening while they prep him, as well as what happens during the surgery, and especially what to expect afterward. He’s awfully worried about playing baseball this summer, so talk to him about some timelines for his return, and what his recovery might entail.”

It often still amazed her, all the responsibility she’d been given in this hospital. It’s what Child Life Specialists did, though. They were advocates for the children, acted as the intermediaries between them and the medical staff, explained the procedures, did the reassuring, held the hands, got involved in a lot of the hugging…the best part of her job, as far as she was concerned. And she loved every second of her job. Couldn’t imagine doing anything else with her life. “How old is he?”

“Eight.”

“Well, luckily, I know more about baseball than I do horseback riding, so I think we’ll be fine.” She grabbed up her clipboard and headed to the door. Then added, “I met Rafe Corbett, by the way. He stopped by with Molly. He seems very nice.”

“He’s your horseback date?” Rick’s words came with a scowl. A very deep scowl, in fact.

“Molly is. She’s having some trouble adjusting.” She noticed the frown, but it wasn’t her place to ask why. She barely knew Rick and didn’t know Rafe at all, and judging from Rick’s reaction to the mention of Rafe, she thought it best to simply ignore the obvious friction. Still, she wondered about it, especially as both men seemed so nice, so easygoing.

Rick drew in a stiff breath then let it out slowly, deliberately, as if trying to quell something inside him. “Well, you tell Molly for me that she’s welcome to come back to work any time she’s up to it. We all miss her, and would love having her back at the hospital again. And I’m worried about her, Edie. As close as she and Grace were…it makes me worry about my son, and what would happen to him if…” He shook his head. “Anyway, tell Molly we all miss her.”

Edie wondered about Molly’s future. Maybe even worried about it. What would happen to her if Rafe didn’t do well taking care of a child? Or, worse yet, if he turned out to be the one person in Lilly Lake who didn’t love Molly?

What would happen to Molly then?

It was something Edie didn’t want to think about…Molly going out to the foster-care system and being put up for adoption. She herself had endured a lifetime with that fear, living with a mother who’d had so many medical problems, a mother who often hadn’t been able to care for herself, a mother who had skirted death for such a long time. At times, it had seemed like the child protective services had perched just outside the door, waiting to take Edie away to some other circumstances, waiting to put her into what they viewed as a better home.

As a child, even as a teenager, it had always scared her. She’d had nightmares about being taken away from her mother, and had spent so many fearful years peeking out the front window, making sure nobody was coming up the steps. Sure, her life with her mother had been difficult, at times even back-breaking. But she’d loved her mother dearly and wouldn’t have done anything differently. Even now, though, when she remembered all those times someone had talked about taking her away…

What they hadn’t understood was that being with her mother, no matter how sick she’d been, no matter how poor they’d been, had been for the best. There’d been no neglect, no abuse. Only love. And Molly needed that now. What she didn’t need, or deserve, was the awful dread that came from the knowledge that she could be ripped out of the life she knew at any moment. No child needed that. So, one way or another, Edie was determined to make sure Molly’s future wasn’t filled with the things she’d lived through.

Of course, her own immediate future didn’t seem so bright, not when she thought about climbing up on that horse.

* * *

“She needs a good adoptive family. Actually, she deserves a good adoptive family. She’s a sweet child and I want her to be in a normal situation. My situation isn’t normal, there’s no room for a child in it.” Twenty minutes after he’d arrived home, Henry Danforth confronted Rafe, in person, with the one solution for Molly that Rafe was not going to accept. Keep her, adopt her.

“Well, then, if that’s your final decision, all I can say is that we’re working on it and we’ll do our best. In the meantime, the county child services agency doesn’t see any reason to remove her from the only home she’s ever known, and stick her in foster-care. Which is what will happen if you don’t look after her for now. And just so you’ll know, the closest foster-mother they have is half an hour outside Lilly Lake, and she already has six children, plus three of her own. Molly would literally have to be squeezed in. So, is that what you want for her, son? To be squeezed in? Or maybe I should ask if that’s what Grace would have wanted?”

He was the one being squeezed here, and Henry was so good at it. Almost as good as Aunt Grace had been. Of course Rafe wanted to take care of Molly in the best way possible. Of course he wanted her in a better situation where she wasn’t going to be one of the many foster-children. “So what are you telling me, Henry?” As if he didn’t already know.

“That if you want to do the right thing, you’re either taking Molly with you when you go home to Boston, or you’re staying here at Gracie House to take care of her for the time being. Which is probably what’s best…letting Molly stay in her own home.” He shrugged. “I mean, there aren’t a lot of other good options here. I’m sorry about that, but your aunt loved that little girl something fierce, and would have adopted her if the courts hadn’t said she was too old. And here’s the thing. She set up a sizeable trust for Molly. You already know about that, but what I haven’t told you yet is that Grace made you the permanent trustee…at least until Molly is twenty-one.”

“Without telling me? Could she do that?” He was surprised yet in a way he wasn’t. His aunt had always expected more of him than he expected of himself.

“Yes, she could, and that’s what she did, son. You were the only one she wanted.”

“So, let me guess. She thought I’d refuse if she’d simply asked me, so she locked me in this way instead?”

“She knew you’d refuse. But Grace always got what she wanted, one way or another. Didn’t mean to surprise you like I did, but that’s the way Grace wanted it, too. Didn’t want you having time to think about ways to back out of the arrangement.”

Rafe chuckled. “I guess I should have seen it coming.” He could almost see the smile on his aunt’s face while she plotted this whole affair. Damn, he missed her! “So, OK. For now, that’s fine. I’ll serve as Molly’s trustee. But I’m assuming that once she’s adopted, that will change.”

Henry shook his head, fighting back an obvious, devious smile. Henry was a burly man. Big, soft, with tons of gray hair on his head. And a pair of hazel, very astute eyes that missed nothing, including the fact that Grace Corbett, God rest her soul, had won this round. “The responsibility’s still yours, even after she’s adopted, son. Which in itself is going to be a problem, because finding placement for a child who comes with Molly’s substantial financial means isn’t going to be easy since there are going to be a whole lot of candidates lining up who’ll want her only because she’s a wealthy little girl. Of course, everything could be settled right now if you’d simply adopt her. Or at least let me write up the guardianship papers for you.”

“That sounds like Aunt Grace’s argument.” Rafe shook his head in frustration. “But I already told you, I’d make a terrible father. And guardian. I don’t have time, I don’t have experience. Maybe my aunt thought that tangling me up in all these arrangements would make me want to be an instant father, but it’s not happening, Henry. I care about Molly, but my focus is on my work. No serious relationships and especially no children. So it’s up to you to find Molly a family who wants her because they love her, not because she’s wealthy. And when you’re convinced that Molly is in the absolute best situation, you can see about changing the terms of Molly’s trust…phasing me out as trustee and giving the responsibility to her parents, because that’s the way it should be. Or I’ll have my attorney do it if you won’t. Bottom line, I’m going to make sure Molly gets the best. Personally oversee the interview process. But I’m not going to keep her.”

Henry listened, still smiling and nodding as if he was really listening, which Rafe knew he was not. He’d known Henry since he was a child. Nice man. Devoted to the Corbett family. As easy to read as a child’s picture book. In fact, Henry’s pictures were so obvious, it wouldn’t have surprised Rafe the least little bit if he’d already had Molly’s adoption papers stashed away, ready to sign, with the name Rafe Samuel Corbett at the bottom. “I mean it, Henry. I’m not going to step in as Molly’s father.”

“I know you mean it, son. And I’m sure everything will work itself out for the best in due course. But that could take a little while. So are you willing to take care of Molly until we get it figured out?”

“Of course I will. And I’ll do it right here, at Gracie House, so she won’t have to be disrupted.” He did have several weeks of vacation time saved up, and a host of medical partners who could take his place, so stepping out of his practice wasn’t going to be a problem for a while. “But she needs her new family sooner rather than later, because I don’t want her getting attached to me, then being pulled away. So work on it, Henry. Don’t put it on the back burner, thinking that the slower you do this, the more I’ll be inclined to keep her. That’s not going to happen. And in the end Molly’s going to be the one to get hurt if that’s what you do.” The last thing he wanted was to hurt her.

Henry nodded again, then continued like he hadn’t heard a word. “I’m not going to hurt that child, son. I’ll promise you that. I have only her best interests at heart.” He crossed his heart. “So, let me go get started, and in the meantime I’d suggest setting up more opportunities to let Molly and Edie Parker be together. Edie’s good with children. Especially good for Molly, and Grace respected that woman in a big way.”

“She’s not married, is she?” Rafe asked, surprised to hear the words coming from his mouth. Why did he care? Why did the image of an empty ring finger flash through his mind?

Henry wiggled his shaggy eyebrows. “Molly has good taste in friends, doesn’t she? Very pretty lady. And, no, she’s not married. As far as I know, not even involved. She’s only been here about three months and, from what I’ve seen, she keeps pretty much to herself. But like I said, Grace really respected her. Took to her right away. Admired the way she worked with the children in the hospital.” Henry’s smile broadened. “Did I mention she’s very pretty?”

“You mentioned it.” And Rafe didn’t disagree. Edie was pretty. Distractingly so…obviously, since that was all he had on his mind at the present.

“OK, then I’ll let the child services here know you’re going to stay here and take care of Molly instead of putting her in a foster-home. It’s a good decision, son, one you won’t regret. And you are doing the right thing for the child.”

As Henry lumbered through the front doors at Gracie House, Rafe thought about the child who was, right now, sitting in Grace’s office, trying her hardest to be a small replica of Grace. So maybe it was a good decision to stay here after all. And maybe he wouldn’t regret it. But it wasn’t fair to Molly. None of it was, and Molly shouldn’t have to find out just how much. That was something he couldn’t prevent, though. At best, he could only ease the transition because, God only knew, he didn’t have anything else inside him. At least, not what Molly needed.

But Edie had it all. Everything Molly needed…It did make him wonder.

* * *

She’d spent most of the afternoon trying to avoid the obvious…her pseudo-date with Rafe Corbett. When she thought about it in terms of spending time with Molly, she felt better. But when Rafe’s image entered her mind, it turned into butterflies in her stomach. He was tall, broad-shouldered. Short brown hair, dark eyes she assumed were also brown, deep tan. And a dimple in his chin. She had to admit a certain weakness for dimples, thanks to the old Cary Grant movies she used to watch with her mother on the days her mother hadn’t been able to get out of bed. Butterfly-makers, for sure. And here she was, primping in front of the car’s rear-view mirror, getting herself ready to go. If she had a list of her top ten most frightening things to do, riding a horse would take a solid place at number five, right after climbing a mountain, jumping out of an airplane, going to the moon and getting involved with the wrong man again.

Thinking about Alex Hastings made her shiver. Wrong man, bad marriage, regrettable decision. More than anything, a huge waste of precious time. One year in, one year out, and almost every day of it filled with regrets for the time she couldn’t get back. But she’d been alone, scared, confused, and he’d been the easy port in her storm. Water under the bridge now. Regrets, yes. Huge ones, not really. Fond memories, not one.

OK, so she’d lived a sheltered life, and done dumb things because of it. She’d admit it, embrace it and, hopefully, learn from it. That was, quintessentially, her…Edie Parker, always behind, taking bad detours, slow to arrive at her life. Well, she’d finally traversed the biggest bumps and arrived. Now, no more detours. She needed to advance herself. Take graduate courses, move along even further in her career. Avoid the bumps at all cost. Or, most of them, since this little horseback excursion promised an afternoon filled with literal ones. But she was looking forward to the time with Molly. Even with Rafe. So that was the price. But the horse?

She had nothing against horses in general. In fact, she loved animals…all animals. Horses, though, only from a distance. And this seemed a good distance, sitting at the end of the driveway of Gracie House, looking well past it to the paddock full of horses, trying to convince herself she’d survive the afternoon reasonably intact.

“You accepted the invitation, so do it,” she said, sucking in a nervous breath through her teeth as she turned into the drive. She drove at a pace slower than an elderly snail, all the way up to the house. Horses…Rafe Corbett…all at once? This was precisely the time when she should have been asking herself what she had done because, honestly, she didn’t know.

* * *

“What the hell is she doing?” Rafe asked under his breath, watching Edie coming up the driveway, her car creeping slower than he thought a car could go.

“Looks to me like she’s avoiding something,” Johnny Redmond commented.

Well, Rafe knew that feeling. Aversions and avoidances. He was the master of them. Practiced them to perfection. Could write a book on all the various techniques. “Look, will you bring Donder around for me?”

“You up to that?” the stable manager asked. “He’s got a lot of spirit in him, especially now that Grace hasn’t taken him out for a while. Your aunt liked it, didn’t want it broken down.”

Rafe smiled. Donder wasn’t the only one with spirit around here. Even if the spirit stepping out of the car right now was fairly tentative, it was there, as big and bold as Donder’s. But with a heart equally as big. “No, I’m probably not up to it,” he told Johnny. “But I want to give it a try anyway. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. My aunt subscribed to that philosophy.” But Rafe wasn’t sure if he meant Donder or Edie.

“Good thing you fix broken bones,” Johnny said, on his way to Donder’s stall.

But Rafe barely heard the words, he was so focused on Edie’s approach. She was stunning. “I’m not convinced you really want to ride,” he called out to her long before she was near the stable, startled by how excited he was to see her again yet not willing to admit to himself that he’d thought about her more than a time or two that afternoon.

“That makes two of us,” she called back. An old-fashioned wicker picnic basket swung from her left arm, while she clasped a red plaid blanket to her chest with her right. “I wasn’t sure what kind of food you were bringing, so I threw together a few things…fried chicken, fruit salad, freshly baked croissants, chocolate-chip cookies…”

“My aunt’s chocolate-chip cookie recipe?” he asked, hopefully.

“My own. I had a lot of time to cook, growing up. Chocolate-chip cookies were one of my favorites to make.”

Well, she had mighty big shoes to fill in the chocolate-chip cookie department, he thought. “So, you fixed all that food this afternoon?” How could anyone look so downright girl-next-door and sexy at the same time? Even the way her ponytail swished back and forth captivated him.

“I took a few hours off work this afternoon…time left over from the last holiday I didn’t take. Haven’t really done much cooking for a while, and it was fun.”

“Better than the peanut-butter sandwiches I was going to go slap together.” Everything about her took his breath away—her blue jeans and white cotton tank top, her white athletic shoes. Simple, nice and natural. Not like the sophisticated, polished women who moved in his social circles in the city. Yet seeing Edie, he did have to admit there was a little emotion trying to creep into a place where he hadn’t felt any in longer than he cared to recollect. Was it…excitement? Could he actually be a little eager over the anticipation of spending some time with her?

No, that couldn’t be it. He didn’t get excited. So it had to be a mild case of relief as Edie was here to stand in as the buffer between Molly and him. Relief. Yes, that made perfect sense. Still, seeing Edie with her hamper full of food, looking the way she did…

OK, maybe his pulse had sped up a beat or two. But, hell, he liked home-made fried chicken. Hadn’t had it ages. That alone was worth a couple of extra beats. And the cookies…“Anyway, how about we find you a ride? Any kind of horse you’re particularly drawn to? We’ve probably got just the one you want.”

“Or I could walk,” she ventured.

Molly stepped into the conversation at that point, went straight to Edie’s side and leaned into her the way an affectionate cat leaned into a person’s leg. “You could ride Ice Cream, Edie.”

“Ice Cream?” both Edie and Rafe asked together.

“Aunt Grace let me name her. She was really sick when she came here to stay, and she wouldn’t eat anything. But I brought her a bowl of ice cream…vanilla. And she loved it. Aunt Grace said that’s what made her better again, so I thought it was a good name. And when I’m big enough to ride on my own, Aunt Grace is going to let me keep Ice Cream as my very own horse because she’s so gentle.”

“I think it’s a perfect name for her,” Edie said, slipping her arm around Molly’s shoulder. “And I’d be honored to ride Ice Cream.”

It was a natural gesture, Rafe noted. Not forced. Not even thought about. From where he stood, it looked like they could have, maybe should have, been mother and daughter. For a moment, he wondered if that could happen. “I think I saw her smile a little when you said her name.”

“Because she still likes ice cream, silly,” Molly said, giggling.

It was such a relief, seeing her act like a little girl her age should act. Rafe knew it had a lot to do with Edie, also with doing something normal from her life before all this tragedy. Unfortunately, it had nothing to do with him, for which he felt a little guilty because he felt…well, he wasn’t exactly sure what it was. Left out, maybe? But that was what he really wanted, wasn’t it? Not to be part of Molly’s permanent situation, not to let her get too attached to him. So, in a way, he was getting exactly what he wanted, yet it didn’t feel as right as it should have. In fact, it felt pretty darned bad, and he hadn’t expected that. “Well, I think Molly has picked you the perfect horse, Edie. Care to saddle up and give her a try?”

“Me, saddle up? Sure, I’ll give it a try, but first you’ve got to tell me which end of the saddle would face the front end of the horse?”

He chuckled. “OK, I get the hint.”

“Not a hint. A blatant statement that if you want to get this picnic under way, you’re going to be the one doing the saddling, while Molly and I go up to the house and make lemonade for the picnic. And I brought the lemons, just in case you didn’t have any.”

“I’d rather help with the saddles,” Molly offered, almost shyly. “Aunt Grace let me do that sometimes, and I know how. And in case Rafey doesn’t know where all the tack is kept…” She stepped away from Edie. “Do you need some help, Rafey?”

“Rafey?” Edie said, fighting back a laugh.

Molly nodded seriously. “That’s his name. Rafey.”

A look of undiluted sheepishness, along with a fierce, red blush, crept over Rafe’s face. The name Rafey wasn’t exactly the manly image he wanted to portray to Edie, or even to Molly, for that matter. But that machismo delusion was certainly shot all to pieces now, leaving him wondering why it even mattered. Because it shouldn’t. Yet it did. “That’s what Aunt Grace called me when I was a boy. She tried to stop when I was high-school age, figured it embarrassed me. Which it did. But it slipped out of her every now and again, and that’s probably where Molly heard the reference.”

“Uh-huh,” Molly piped up. “Aunt Grace always called you Rafey.”

“Rafey,” Edie repeated, smiling. “Well, it’s kind of cute, I’ll have to admit. Rafey…Rafey…” she repeated a couple of times, as if trying it on for size. “Has a nice ring to it. Dr. Rafey Corbett…lacks sophistication and pretense.” She grinned. “But it’s good.”

“Maybe it’s good, but only when you’re five years old,” Rafe said, as the embarrassment dissolved into good nature. “Not when you’re thirty-five.”

“So, then, what you’re telling me is that I can’t call you…” She liked the way his discomfort gave way to ease. Rafe was trying really hard to fit in, to relate to Molly, which gave her hope. It wasn’t a natural fit on him, but he was working on it and, at this point that’s all Edie could ask. For now, probably all Grace would have expected.

“What I’m telling you is that you can’t.” Rafe gave his head a crisp shake in emphasis, and Edie couldn’t help laughing. Rafe Corbett was a big man sitting in the saddle who was saddled with a little boy’s name. It was so endearing and, for a moment, she saw some vulnerability there. A little bit of softness clouding his eyes over a nickname, perhaps? Or maybe he was only reminiscing about something nice from the time when Grace had called him Rafey. Whatever it was, it made him less stiff. Not enough to be considered loose or relaxed, but he was definitely not so starchy now. Definitely working on it, too.

“You can call him Rafey,” Molly piped right up. “Aunt Grace did.”

“Molly can call me Rafey,” Rafe interjected. “Only Molly.”

He said it with a little twinkle in his eyes. Or was that a challenge? Either way, it melted Edie’s heart just a little bit, as Rafe clearly wasn’t comfortable with the name, yet he was going to put up with it from Molly. That was just plain sweet of him. So, maybe, just maybe, her job to help him realize that he did have all kinds of father potential wouldn’t be so difficult after all. She hoped so, because Rafe was a little awkward about it right now. Yet given some time, along with some good coaching…who knew? And in the future, well, who knew about that one either? Possibly, with some luck, Molly would be able to call him Daddy sooner than Edie had hoped for. That would be nice, Edie decided. What Grace would have wanted. But for a moment her heart clenched when she thought about Rafe and Molly together, just the two of them. No one else in that picture. It’s what she had to do, and that was what she’d have to keep telling herself. Getting the two of them together was what she had to do. What she’d promised to do.




CHAPTER THREE


“COULD you two slow up a little?” Edie called from behind them. She was lagging back quite a way, not because she wanted to but because it was the best she could do. Rafe and Molly were doubling up on the lead horse, with Molly riding in a pink tandem saddle right behind Rafe, hanging on to him with her face pressed to his back. From Edie’s position, it was cute. But she wondered if Rafe was bothered by it, because he looked…uncomfortable. He seemed too rigid in the saddle, even to an untrained observer such as herself. Yet Molly looked happier than Edie had seen her looking in days. Possibly because Rafe had made her happy. Or it could have been about her honest need to hold on to someone strong for a while…something Edie understood better than she cared to, given the way the first time she’d really held on to someone had turned out. Of course, everybody needed that extra jolt in their lives at some time, didn’t they? Strength from someone else. Someone to support them on the journey, to guide them when they were lost.

She’d certainly had those moments in her own life…moments with her mother, moments with Alex. Good and bad. Going down the right path, going down the wrong one. Rafe wasn’t the wrong path for Molly, though. He didn’t know that, of course, even though Molly obviously did. Most likely, he’d never thought of himself in terms of any kind of course for Molly, which was something Edie certainly intended to change.

But the path Edie was on today had nothing to do with any of that. It was all about the path she was taking on the back of a very gentle horse named Ice Cream—a horse, as it turned out, who was absolutely perfect for a beginner to ride. Vanilla in color, she was mellow, plodding along in no hurry to get anywhere, and if it could be said that a horse was stopping along the way to smell the roses, that was what it seemed like Ice Cream was doing. Smart horse, taking in her surroundings—the path, the sky, the flowers. It wasn’t a bad way to go through life, Edie supposed. Too bad more people couldn’t take a lesson from Ice Cream. “So, when do we get to stop?” she called out, when they rounded the bend and she saw the lake ahead. “Right now, I hope, because this is a perfect place.” At least, that was what her aching backside was telling her.

Like he’d been reading her mind about stopping, Rafe brought Donder, a well-muscled, brown and white Appaloosa, to a halt, then turned in his saddle to face her. “It’s only another five miles,” he said, without cracking a smile.

“Five?” Pulling Ice Cream up alongside him, she looked square at him and saw, up close, his very stern expression, but also saw the corner of his mouth twitch up imperceptibly in a fight to keep from smiling. “Then why don’t you go on ahead, take part of the picnic food with you, while Molly and I stay here and have our picnic at the lake. Is that OK with you, Molly?” His eyes were dancing now. Beautiful. Mischievous. Unnerving. But she didn’t look away. It took everything she had in her to stay eye to eye with him, and keep a straight face at that. She managed it, though, with some struggle. “We’ll have our picnic right here, just the two of us, while Rafe goes on ahead and finds his own place to picnic.”

Very straight-faced, Molly said, “You can’t take the lemonade with you, Rafey. It’s two against one. We get to keep it here. But you can come back and have some when you want it.”

“I think you’ve been thoroughly told,” Edie remarked.

“I think I’ve been charmed by the two most beautiful women in Lilly Lake,” he replied, slipping down out of his saddle then lifting Molly to the ground. Heading straight to Ice Cream, he steadied the horse and held up his hand to help Edie. And in that instant, when the silky skin of her palm slid across his, if there wasn’t a visible spark, there sure was an unseeable one, felt by both of them, because Edie and Rafe both pulled back in that moment of extraordinary awareness, and simply stared at each other. Speechless, almost to the point of dumbfounded. Edie wasn’t sure how long it was, but the intensity couldn’t be questioned. At least for her. As for Rafe…he was still holding tight to her gaze when she finally had to break it or become completely lost in it. “I, um…thanks,” she finally said, letting go of his hand. “For the compliment, and the help.”

His answer was to arch his eyebrows. Then he turned away. Unaffected? Edie didn’t know about Rafe, but she surely knew about herself, and at that moment there was nothing in her, from her head to her toes, that wasn’t affected. Not one little bit of her anywhere. And try as she may, she couldn’t shrug out of the mood, or even shake herself hard out of it. Not after a minute, not after five minutes. Which meant she might be in deep trouble.

* * *

“So tell me about yourself,” Rafe said, as he spread the blanket on the ground. Molly was a hundred yards away, wading in water up to her ankles, looking for goldfish and bullfrogs, expressing a wish to find a whale and an octopus, too, while Edie and Rafe were laying out the picnic food. “Other than the fact that you’re a child life specialist and that my aunt thought highly of you…so does Molly, by the way, that’s about all I know.”

“There’s not much to tell. I’ve been in Lilly Lake for a few months now. I work, I like to read, I have a cat…” She shrugged. Getting personal wasn’t easy for her because she’d spent most of her life trying to stay guarded. On purpose. One little slip of the tongue and the social workers had been on the doorstep, one misspoken word to her teacher that could be perceived as something wrong in her life and everything had gone crazy. The possibility had always been there that she could be snatched away from her mother, thrown into a foster-home where nobody loved her, and her mother forced into a nursing home until some kindly lawyer made it all better, or her mother died. Grim reality then, bad memories of it even now. “I’m from New York City originally. Born and raised there. Went to school there, didn’t ever have any call to wander very far away until I took this job in Lilly Lake. And I’m not married now, but you already know that.”

“Not married now?”

“Well, there were a couple of years in my life when I was. You know, naive schoolgirl meets big charmer. He wasn’t what I needed, I wasn’t what he wanted and in the end we didn’t even make any memories, good, bad or otherwise. So, you’ve never been married, have you? Your aunt told me you…”

“She told you I avoid it like the plague. Right?”

“Something like that.”

“Well, she was right about that. I do avoid it, maybe not so much like the plague as I do like an entanglement I just don’t want to deal with. The thing is, Aunt Grace harped at me for my lifestyle, for being single. Yet she never married, and she never considered that a lack in herself.”

“But she considered it a lack in you?” Edie asked.

“I don’t honestly know.”

“Maybe she just wanted to see you have a shot at something she missed.”

He thought about that for a moment. Frowned. “She never seemed lonely, never really struck me as someone who wanted a permanent relationship in her life.”

“Yet she was surrounded by so many friends, and she took in children all the time. She kept herself busy, Rafe, and she was devoted to the people in her life, but maybe, at night, when she went to bed, there were times when she would have preferred not going alone. It could be she didn’t consider your lifestyle a lack so much as she didn’t want you to go to bed alone every night either. I’d say that’s someone who truly loved you.”

“I was lucky,” he said.

“More than lucky. Blessed.”

Rafe was quiet for a moment, his eyes fixed on something far off that wasn’t really there. Then he cleared his throat and drew in a deep breath. “So, what else is there to know about you?”

“Not much, really. I’m taking some online classes in preparation for getting my master’s degree. I like gardening. Oh, and I’m thinking about getting a kitten to keep my other cat, Lucy, company, when I’m away.”

Even to Edie, all the explanations sounded like uptight chatter. Nothing too significant, nothing too revealing…pretty much the way she’d trained herself to chat when people had insisted on it. It was all laid out, evenly rehearsed, rarely off the script. Reverting back to old habits was what she did when she was nervous. Rafe made her nervous.

“No family?” he asked. “Parents? Brothers or sisters?”

She shook her head. “Not any more. Maybe some distant relatives I’ve never met but, basically, it’s just me now. And you?”

“Just Jess. And we’re not really too close. We talk occasionally, see each other whenever I get to New York City…he’s a firefighter there.”

“I thought Grace said he was a doctor.”

“He is…was. Trauma surgeon. But he experienced a loss in Afghanistan…his fiancée died in his arms, and he left medicine. Took up a more risky life. Don’t know why, and I’m not going to argue with him about it.”

“Even though you think he should go back to medicine?”





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