Автор: Gill Sims

Family begins with a capital eff.I’m wondering how many more f*cking ‘phases’ I have to endure before my children become civilised and functioning members of society? It seems like people have been telling me ‘it’s just a phase!’ for the last fifteen bloody years. Not sleeping through the night is ‘just a phase.’ Potty training and the associated accidents ‘is just a phase’. The tantrums of the terrible twos are ‘just a phase’. The picky eating, the back chat, the obsessions. The toddler refusals to nap, the teenage inability to leave their beds before 1pm without a…

Tere tulemast emme maailma! Emme rüblikust poeg Peter on oma iPhone’iga kokku kasvanud, nagu ühendaks neid nabanöör. Puberteediikka jõudnud Jane on võtnud kindlalt pähe Instagramis staariks saada. Issi käib aga aina tihedamini eksootilistel ärireisidel … Pinged emme abielus kasvavad, lapsed muutuvad aina pöörasemaks ja maja kipub igast otsast lagunema. Ainult Judgy, Uhke ja Üllas Terjer, jääb ustavaks. Lisaks ootavad emmet uued väljakutsed, sest ta asub tööle trendikas start-up’is. Lisaks sellele, et 42aastasena pole kuigi lihtne kott-toolist mingigi väärikusega…

Issi on Väga Tähtis Mees ja talle meeldivad tehnikavidinad. Ja tema kuur. Lapsed Peter ja Jane istuvad lakkamatult mõne ekraani taga, ning kui nad seda ei tee, üritavad nad teineteist ära tappa ja ajavad emmet hulluks. On emme 39. sünnipäev. Tema ees seisab lohutu pilt tulevikust, täis inimesi, kes kutsuvad teda edasijõudnute joogasse, ning ontlikke raamatuklubisid, kus igaüks väidab end olevat svipsis pärast esimest klaasi veini ja ütleb asju nagu „Isver, kas sa jood tõesti veel ühe?“. Aga emme ei taha seda kõike! Ta ei taha, et temast saaks üks neist mõistliku…

Why Mommy Swears is the much anticipated new novel from Gill Sims, author of the hilarious Why Mommy Drinks and online sensation Peter and Jane.It’s every parents’ nightmare – the start of the school holidays – and instead of sitting in the sun, reading a book over a cold, crisp glass of Pinot Grigio, Mummy has two bored moppets to attend to. After frantically booking sports camps, child minder slots, not to mention time off work, Mummy is exhausted. But this is only the beginning…After being dragged to join the school’s PTA in the new term by an annoyingly kind-spirited…

The hilarious second novel, and Sunday Times No 1 Bestseller, from author of the smash hit Why Mummy Drinks.Welcome to Mummy’s world…The Boy Child Peter is connected to his iPad by an umbilical cord, The Girl Child Jane is desperate to make her fortune as an Instagram lifestyle influencer, while Daddy is constantly off on exotic business trips…Mummy’s marriage is feeling the strain, her kids are running wild and the house is steadily developing a forest of mould. Only Judgy, the Proud and Noble Terrier, remains loyal as always.Mummy has also found herself a new challenge, working for…